First Date
by The Zack Syndrome
Summary: When Sasuke asks Naruto out on a date, the first surprise was he said yes. From there he gets one surprise after another, and he's loving every second of it! But will their friends let him? Warning, Yaoi, slight swearing. 21st chapter up! Please review! :
1. First Date

Warning---Pathetic attempt at Yaoi, some swearing, and btw, I DON'T OWN THESE PEEPS. No matter how much I want to.

Kakashi: I'm pathetic, I admit it. Doing a one shot when I should be finishing my other stories. But I'm just recently REALLY turned on by Yaoi, so yeah.

Sakura: B-but that means I don't get a p-part!

Anzu: Ha-ha.

* * *

A raven haired boy, about 14 stood sheltered in a door way of Konoha. He was waiting for someone, a very special someone. Sasuke Uchiha was waiting for Naruto Uzimaki; they were going on a date. At 10 they were supposed to meet right here, but it was already 11:30, had Naruto chickened out? Sasuke had finally got up the nerve to ask him out and here he was being stood up. Although that'd explain why he said yes…

It was a quarter to noon when the short blonde showed up, blue eyes sparkling. He took one look at Sasuke and began to explain.

"Sorry Sasuke-Temi, the ramen house was giving out free ramen, and I lost track of time," he blushed and tried to look cute, to no effect. Sasuke glared at him and then started walking off. Naruto stood shocked for a second and then heard Sasuke yell.

"Stop lagging Dobe...I'll leave you here." Naruto ran and caught up with him, and stopped him, in public and hugged him.

"W-what was t-that for?" Sasuke stammered. Naruto just winked and strolled ahead, bright eyed and bushy tailed, and Sasuke left thinking things. (Kudos if you know what he's thinking.) They'd been hoping to go through the date without meeting too many people they knew. Luck was with them, they just ran into two people they knew, and just the wrong people, Sakura and Ino. They were looking at clothes and Sakura spotted them as they tried to make a break for it.

"Hey you two, wait up." They had no choice but to stop. Sakura caught up and as always, began hitting on Sasuke. Ino was also as usual trying to hit Sakura. "What are you two doing here?" Sakura asked curiously.

"We're on a! Mmph, Sasuke you bastard, you coulda killed me!" Sasuke had grabbed Naruto and attempted to throttle him. Sakura and Ino laughed and then Sasuke took Naruto aside.

"You moron, don't tell _them!_ No one shall no about this okay? Our secret." And under the guise of killing him again he hugged him, and then turned back to the girls. "So, uh, we're gonna go and uh…Practice…Stuff…" Naruto had thrown him off his cool and calm feeling, and to kill the awkwardness he waved and then grabbed Naruto and ran.

"That was really weird, what was up with Sasuke?" Sakura muttered to Ino.

"I don't know, but it sounded like Naruto was saying they were on a, **date!" **

"No way Sasuke is gay Ino you pig!" And so they resumed their bickering and fighting, and Naruto and Sasuke got back to their date.

"That was a close one," Sasuke said, sighing with relief.

"But why does it have to be a secret, I like you, if you like me you shouldn't be ashamed of it." Sasuke blushed and thought about it as they walked on, window shopping. He was right, if he really did like Naruto he shouldn't be afraid about it. But he still couldn't bring himself to admit it out loud, not yet, not now.

"You're pretty quiet 'Suke," Naruto observed. He was looking up at him, a slightly worried, slightly loving look. Sasuke blinked at the nickname and then giggled lightly, the first giggle Naruto had heard from Sasuke. Like a girls, but cuter, Naruto smiled.

"I was thinking about what you said," Sasuke grabbed his hand, and was navigating them to an alley. Naruto grinned and nuzzled against him. He put on the tough guy act everywhere else, but when he was with Sasuke, he just felt soft and loving. They stopped against a wall and stood there for a second, nervous. Sasuke made the first move and hugged him, moving his head against Naruto's. It was a weird, but strangely satisfying first kiss.

"So," said an eager Sasuke. "Should we go to my place?"

"We've only been out for an hour stupid, let's do something else first, get in the mood." Naruto nudged him and pointed to a palm reading booth.

"Oh you know that stuffs just shit, what do you want to go to a palm reader for?"

"Well, uhm…Uh, I don't know, but I do!" And he elbowed Sasuke in the ribs, and then dragged him to the booth. About ten seconds later Naruto was sitting on the stool and a creepy old woman was giving his hand the full treatment. Sasuke simmered and Naruto listened intently. Sasuke caught a few snatches of what they were saying in-between his mutterings. Things like, long life, and children and, he noticed she looked up at Sasuke, a nice husband. It was at that point Sasuke stomped off. Naruto glared at his retreating back and then thanked the woman and ran after him.

"What, you jealous of an old lady, come on, you're never going to see her again, what's the big deal?" Naruto jumped in front of him and stopped him from moving.

"I don't know Dobe; I just want to go now, okay?" Naruto shrugged and took his hand and was lead back to Sasuke's house. He'd never been to Sasuke's house and was amazed at how big it was. It was more of a mansion than a house! Sasuke grinned as Naruto's jaw dropped about 10 feet.

"Holy shit dude, this is your house!" He nodded and opened the door; Naruto stepped in and was further amazed.

"Wow, look at those stairs, WOAH, and look at that, wow this is just amazing! My house is a shack compared to this, lucky!"

"Yeah, it is pretty nice huh?" He'd always thought so, but when Naruto said it, well, it made him fill with happy. He gave Naruto the grand tour, ending with his bedroom, which he showed in much detail.

"Lie down on the bed, isn't that just the best mattress ever?" Sasuke grinned, and blushed.

"Wow, it is!" Naruto didn't see Sasuke's look. Now it was too late, Sasuke thought. Sasuke tackled him and held him tight, pressing him against the bed, kissing his neck.

"Sasuke, what the hell?" he was stunned, he'd wanted to do this, but it was all so fast. Then the thought occurred, Oh fuck slow sex, this feel goooood. Sasuke was taking off his shirt; Naruto helped him and then rolled Sasuke over. Now he was top dog, and he liked it! He bent down, licking around his nipple, tantalizing him. Then, just like Sasuke, he regained dominance and pulled off Naruto's shirt. He began the same treatment as Naruto had given him. Then off with the pants, both, now the boxers. It was a lot for a first date, but the thought going through both their minds was I've liked him for so long, this is making up for all that wasted time.

The feel of Naruto, naked, against him made Sasuke warm all over. He felt a sudden urge to do him, to make him scream in pleasure. He stopped licking him and mumbled out his desire.

"Dobe, I want to, uhm, do it with you. Do you want to?" Naruto blushed furiously and nodded, hugging him tight and then rolling onto his stomach, braced. Sasuke got on him slowly, he first relaxed him a bit, and then his hard member moved slowly into his partner. First times are always rough, but Sasuke got what he wanted, Naruto screamed. There were tears welling in the corners of his eyes, but he withstood it. It was for Sasuke, he meant a lot to him, and he'd take it. Sasuke stopped for a second, unsure, and then thrust again, slower though. Naruto moaned slightly, grabbing his own member and pumping it.

This continued for a few more minutes, but with one final thrust and pump Sasuke came in his partner, and Naruto climaxed, they both moaned simultaneously and Sasuke pulled out of him, rolling over and sighed contently. Naruto was still moaning, he rolled over to face Sasuke's back, cuddling against him gently.

"Hey 'Suke…That felt really good baby…" Sasuke nodded. Naruto nuzzled him again and then slowly, they drifted off to sleep in each other's arms.

**Next Morning**

Naruto woke up first, and quickly remembering the nights events nuzzled Sasuke and kissed him lightly. Sasuke looked so…So peaceful in his sleep, and really cute. He smiled one of his childish grins and kissed him again. It had been a good first date.

* * *

Kakashi: Wheee, it's 3:18 in the morning! Okay, I hope you all liked that, and uh yeah.

Sakura: OO WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT?

Anzu: I thought it was hot…

Sakura: …He's gay…Jesus Christ..

Kakashi: Okay, moving along, uh, peace, please rate, I'm half asleep, so nothing toooo mean, okay? I know the ending may have been a little rushed, but still… It's my first completed story! Yay! Pathetic isn't it? Oh well, see ya next time!

I'd like to thank: KyoKat003 and SasuIshLove900, for inspiring me, and showing me through their stories the beauty of creative writing.


	2. Encounters of the the Girl Kind

Kakashi: Okay, I lied, due to pathetic reader response, this isn't gonna be a one shot anymore, but if it gets ugly, well, it's going back.

Sakura: I see you scheming, what the hell are you doing to Sasuke this time!

Anzu: Sigh…

* * *

She tried to forget about it, she really did, but Ino's words were haunting her, he's gay, he's gay. Sakura Haruno, age 14 wakes from a nightmare. Across Konoha her nightmare and his counterpart were also stirring from a well deserved nap. The day before had been a mission, and then a little sex in the evening to lighten the mood. Naruto Uzimaki always woke up first, perhaps it was the nine tailed fox in him.

He got up and went to the kitchen; the first time he'd been in Sasuke's mansion like house he had gotten lost, now he knew where he was and why he was there. He got himself some coffee, he didn't like the taste, but it woke him up. Then he got Sasuke tea. He wasn't slave, but he felt like it sometimes. He liked it though, anything for his Sasuke made him happy. Just a few days ago he'd gone on his first date with the beautiful, yet manly Sasuke Uchiha. He'd been in complete bliss since then and he didn't want these happy days to end.

Sasuke had been awake first though this time, but he had faked being asleep. He didn't want to Naruto to know he was worried. Sakura had been acting really weirdly to him lately, not that that was new, but it was a different weird. Like she knew what he was doing every night. He shook his head and rubbed the sleep from his eyes and stood up, stretching. He sighed again, too many things on his mind. He walked down to the kitchen; Naruto's back was turned to him. Sasuke grinned and decided to take advantage. He crept up behind him and then grabbed him in a bear hug.

"Hey Dobe, how's my sexy little kitsune?"

"Good, but he just had a heart attack, why so awake love?" Naruto gave his childish grin and giggled in that way that made Sasuke's heart skip a beat.

"Sex is the elixir of life Dobe, you should know that by now," Naruto grinned again. He handed Sasuke his tea and smiled.

"All other days I have to wake you up to give you your tea." Sasuke shrugged and thanked him, then sat down at his table, all of a sudden a serious look on his face. "What's wrong 'Suke?" Naruto asked with a concerned tone in his voice.

"Nothing, I'm just thinking that eventually someone's going to figure us out,"

"I thought we went over this baby…" Naruto sat down next to him and kissed his cheek. "Even if they do what's it matter? One less thing to hide,"

"I know, but, if Sakura finds out she'll be heart broken and our pathetic team work will go down the shitter," Naruto blinked at the harsh words. This wasn't the Sasuke he knew, sure, he was depressed half the time, but he was never like this. Naruto decided words were not the course of action to be taken and instead kissed him again. The words: It'll be okay, ran through his mind several times but it didn't like a reassuring thing for him to say. Naruto then gave a cute smile and a wink and then headed upstairs to change into his usual outfit, leaving Sasuke to brood. Kakashi Sensei would be expecting them at the bridge in about an hour. He waited till Naruto had changed and left before he himself did so.

Sakura was already at the bridge and was also looking moody. Naruto took a look at her and then said in a blank voice.

"Is today national depressed day or what?" He grimaced and sat down on the rails of the bridge. Sakura gave him a strange look, it was a look that'd he'd have killed for a few months ago. But that was before Sasuke, now he didn't want Sakura, or Ino, or any girl for that matter.

"Where's Sasuke Naruto?" she asked in the same tone.

"Oh he should be here soon."

"How do you know?" Naruto gasped quietly and then said, chuckling.

"You know Sakura, uh, telepathy. We share a brain Sasuke and me." Sakura looked at him in disgust and spat.

"Share a brain or a bed Naruto, huh?" Her inner Sakura was driving her forward now, and she was fine with that. "What do you two do every night; I know you go home together!" Naruto was spared from answering this by the arrival of Sasuke, and shortly after Master Kakashi.

"Okay, today we're doing basic exercises, no missions today, it gives you a day to rest," Master Kakashi announced. All in all it was a short and easy day, at which point they headed in separate directions. Or so it appeared. Naruto and Sasuke joined together after a bit, and Sakura was trailing them as stealthily as possible. She watched as they got some shaved ice, which they shared. She watched as they bought scrolls, and groceries and even clothes. Sasuke was picking out clothes for Naruto to wear.

"Very suspicious…" Sakura muttered to herself.

"Do you mean you stalking Sasuke and Naruto, because if you do I agree," It was Ino. "I didn't know you were into that kind of stuff Sakura. It just goes to show you can never tell," She had a bemused, curious look on her face.

"If you must know, I think you're right about them being gay. They ate ice shavings together and now they're….Good god Naruto's in a skirt." And it was true; Sasuke grinned and nodded at Naruto. Who in turn started blushing furiously at some comment Sasuke had made. Ino blinked and then nodded herself.

"Okay, fine, now you know, stop following them around."

"Hell no, I want hard cold evidence, just because Naruto is a cross dresser means nothing!"

"Then I guess I'll have to come with you Billboard Brow." Sakura growled menacingly and Ino shut up. 15 minutes and 3 more skirts they were finally leaving the clothing store. One final stop at the House of Ramen and they headed back to Sasuke's house. When they had gone in and been in for a few minutes Ino and Sakura held a conference.

"Now what climb this tree and stare in his bedroom, I mean seriously, this is stupid."

"That's exactly what we'll do, we're gonna climb this tree." Sakura said in an annoyed fashion. She then, as if to impress Ino, remembered the lessons Master Kakashi had taught them, and walked straight up the tree. She stopped on a branch and peered deep into a window in front of her. Ino wasn't impressed though, she could do it too.

"I can't believe I'm doing this Sakura."

"Shut up Ino."

On the inside of the house more or less the same conversation was being held.

"I can't believe you're making me wear a dress."

"Shut up Dobe, you're sexy looking."

"I don't see you wearing one though!"

"I'm not because I'm manlier than you Dobe. And that dress makes your outstanding features even more vibrant."

"You're definitely gay now 'Suke, you're giving fashion advice.

"Yeah, well one of us has to dress cool." Sasuke nodded to the bed and Naruto obediently lay down on it. "Mmhmm, Dobe you're so sexy lying there. Mind if I join?"

"Maybe you can." Naruto said slyly, in as a girly a voice as he could muster. Sasuke lay down on him, kissing his gently at first, then feeling his warms lips move back against his own. Their lips parted, Naruto's tongue finding its way into Sasuke's mouth, which opened wider, letting a moan escape from it. Sasuke pushed off for a second and pulled off his shirt slowly, the girls in the tree watching transfixed. Naruto went after his favorite nipple, the right one and Sasuke lay there in a trance.

It was broken by Naruto removing his own shirt, a tank top, and Sasuke smiled appreciatively, gazing at his somewhat muscled chest and stomach. He then move down slowly along his body and removed the skirt, grabbing Naruto's member, pumping it slowly. The girls in the tree were now blushing furiously and pretending to cover their eyes. There fingers were parted in just the right places. That's when the tree decided to inconvenience them. They both were scooting forward to get a better look at the action, and the limb snapped and they careened through the window, glass shattering everywhere.

"FUCK, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO TO MY HOUSE, WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING HERE ANYWAY!" Screamed Sasuke after regaining consciousness, he'd blocked Naruto from any damage; but his back was bloody and cut from protecting his lover.

* * *

Kakashi: Wow, this was originally a one shot, but I've gotten a lot of hits in the first few hours, plus, i'm really getting into the characters, it's really fun.

Anzu: I'm proud of you Master Kakashi!


	3. AHS: Attempted Hospital Sex

Kakashi: Wheee, people actually like my story! It's a miracle.

Anzu: You're so down on yourself…

Kakashi: Yes, but still. Anyway, I want to apologize for taking a while to get this out, I fell asleep after writing number 2 and then I ate dinner and stuff. Anyway, on with the story.

* * *

"The hospital sucks," mumbled the raven haired boy. He sighed loudly and stared ahead at the wall. Visiting hours were almost up, where was Naruto? There was a knock on the door and he brightened. It opened and he darkened. It was Sakura and Ino, the reason he was here in the first place. Figures, he thought, they never did know to quit bothering me.

"Uh hey Sasuke, how're you feeling today?" Ino asked, avoiding his eyes, which were shooting daggers at the two of them.

"I'm fine, my back hurts like hell, but that's nothing new," he growled. He'd been here a week, and he was almost ready to be discharged. This visit would probably worsen his condition.

"Oh, Sasuke, I swear we didn't mean to," Sakura was cut off.

"Didn't mean to what! Spy on me? Wreck my house, slice my back open? Did you enjoy watching us, huh?" Sasuke shouted, and then turned away from them. Ino flinched and sighed, approaching the bed.

"I know you're mad at us, but why didn't you tell us? We still like you, no matter who you sleep with," with a glance at Sakura, she revised her sentence, "Well I'll still like you."

"I don't give a shit if you like me, I can't believe you spied on us!" Ino sighed.

"We just wanted to know for sure Sasuke; it was a one time thing!"

"Sure it was." Sasuke glared at them again. "Well now you know for sure you happy?" No response. He sighed and closed his eyes, imagining Naruto with him, and then it wasn't his imagination.

"Hi guys, hey 'Suke!" Naruto said, making a beeline for Sasuke. "How's my favorite boy?" Sasuke sighed.

"You have no tact Naruto, seriously, none at all."

"What do you mean? Now that they know, I can be open, right?" Sasuke sighed again. Sakura glared at Naruto silently, and Ino gazed curiously at all three of them.

"Well, even if I can't have Sasuke, I still think it's cute that you two are together," Ino remarked boldly. Now it was her turn to be glared at by Sakura.

"So Dobe, what took you so long?" Sasuke asked curiously.

"Well, I was buying certain things," Naruto winked at this and Sasuke grinned. "And I stopped for ramen on the way here." Sasuke rolled his eyes and grabbed Naruto's hand.

"What am I going to do about your ramen obsession, hmm?" Naruto shrugged and hugged him gingerly. "Ah fuck, how much did that guy want to fix the wall, did he say?" Sasuke asked, remembering the plight of his broken home. Naruto handed him a piece of paper.

"If it's not too much, I can pay for it." Ino proposed.

"That'd be nice of you Ino, thanks!" Ino took the piece of paper and folded it, then put it into a pocket. "Well, Sakura and I'll be off now, feel better Sasuke, and bye Naruto. COME ON SAKURA." She shoved Sakura out the door and sighed loudly, leaving Naruto and Sasuke alone.

"Ugh, that was disgusting!" Sakura cried. "Why does he like that little freak!"

"He's not a freak Sakura," Ino sighed.

"Ugh, that was disgusting!" Sasuke cried. Naruto nodded and kisses Sasuke's cheek tenderly.

"I know I've been thanking you all week, but I want to thank you again for doing this 'Suke." Naruto blushed and kissed Sasuke again.

"It was nothing, I was on top, it would've happened like that anyway." Sasuke smiled and then grimaced. "Unfortunately we can't do that again for a while, okay Dobe?" Naruto frowned and then smiled again.

"That's fine, as long as you're okay 'Suke," he grinned and hopped up on the bed, lying lightly on Sasuke.

"Now that you're here nothing hurts anymore," Sasuke winked and hugged Naruto down on him. Naruto grinned and kissed him again, pushing him down more. Sasuke moaned lightly, slipping his hands down the back of Naruto's pants, squeezing his cheeks. They blushed equally and then his hands moved around to the front, running his fingers along Naruto's length. Naruto shivered with pleasure lightly and arched his back slowly up. And then off of Sasuke, a nurse had come in.

"Oh, oh my god, uhm, uh, err, visiting hours are, uh, o-over," She blushed furiously and ran out of the room. Sasuke shrugged and gave Naruto another kiss.

"We can finish at home when I'm released, okay Dobe?" Sasuke smiled and waved as Naruto turned, almost running into the nurse, who had been watching from around the open door. The next person he ran into was Ino, who was waiting in the lobby.

"Oh, uh, hi Ino, why are you still here?" Naruto smiled weakly and blinked at her.

"Waiting for you, I wanted to talk to you."

"Oh, uhm, okay, I have to be going though, so tell me as we go," Naruto started walking and Ino joined him.

"So, is Sasuke as good a kisser as I think?" She giggled and Naruto's eye twitched slightly.

"Well, I don't know what you think, but yeah. Like a dream," he grinned at the thought. Ino gazed at him with a weird look in her eye. She took action and pushed up against him; he blinked and looked at her. "What?"

"I love you Naruto." And she took another action, she pressed him against the wall and kissed him roughly, he struggled away.

"What the fuck are you doing Ino?"

"I'm kissing you, why?"

"I don't like you, I like Sasuke!" he started to run away from her but she stopped him, and began giggling madly.

"Oh good, you passed my test! I wanted to make sure you weren't just playing with Sasuke's heart," she grinned.

"What in hell are you talking about?" Naruto blinked, that was a quick test. She nodded and repeated her sentence.

"I was making sure you wouldn't betray him or anything, so I pretended to like you. You passed!" A very short test it was, and Naruto knew better. He also knew better than to accuse her of that. "Well see ya later Naruto!" she ran off.

"And that," Naruto said to himself. "Was just another reason why I'm glad I went gay. Girls are confusing!" and he walked home, thinking how weird that had been.

Ino was fast walking home, Naruto tastes good, she kept thinking. What was wrong with her, she wasn't testing him, she really did like him. He was cute, and when he wasn't being stupid he was really brave and strong. Though that was the thing she was counting on, him being too stupid to tell the difference between her and Sasuke. She would use the art of transformation, become Sasuke, and get to her Naruto. The only thing was if he'd fall for it.

Naruto crashed immediately onto the bed when he had gotten back to Sasuke's place. He was tired out for some reason, and he was almost asleep when there was a tap on the replacement window. He pulled a kunai from under his pillow then opened the window to see…

"Sasuke, what the hell are you doing here, you should be in the hospital!"

"I snuck out to see you Dobe."

"Aww, 'Suke you sweet heart," he hugged him close and kissed him. The familiar taste of Sasuke filled him with joy. He pulled him to the bed and lay down, letting Sasuke be on top. Sasuke kissed him again, his tongue moving across the boundaries of his mouth into Naruto's. This was the happiest Naruto had been in days, finally his Sasuke was here. And then he wasn't, he pulled off of Naruto and looked ill.

"I'm sorry Naruto, I shouldn't have left the hospital, my wounds are opening." And without another word, he'd jumped out the window and was bolting away.

"What the fuck was that?" Naruto said angrily. "What was the point?"

A while away Ino sat panting on a park bench. Her expression was of anger and tiredness.

"Shit, I almost lost my transformation, he made me break concentration. Oh well, I'll get him next time."

**The Next Day: **

"What do you mean you didn't sneak out last night!"

"I didn't leave my room Dobe, I swear, I wouldn't have left you like that at any rate." Sasuke looked at him, a weird expression on his face. "Are you sure this wasn't a dream?

"Yeah, yeah that must have been it, I had a dream." Naruto sighed and looked at his Sasuke. Sasuke looked at his Dobe. "I fell asleep really fast when I got home. That must be it. Don't worry about it, okay 'Suke?" Naruto squeezed his hand softly and smiled.

"Okay, but if they keep me here any longer, I might sneak out for real." Sasuke said dully, kissing Naruto softly.

* * *

Kakashi: Yay, 3rd chapter, hope you all like it! Okay, no good lemony content for this chappy, but I wasn't particularly in the mood. Anyway, uhm, more good stuff to come! Peace.


	4. Flowers and Tears

Kakashi: Argh, okay, so I've been coping with major writer's block, and I've had to deal with Sakura quitting, so I've hired a beta, YaoiWriter2500. (But he has some good stuff too, so check that out.)

Anzu: So anyway, last time we were left with two puzzled ninjas and a scheming Ino, (I know you all hate her.) so on with the show!

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It was beginning to rain as Naruto stepped out of the flower shop. He was getting his 'Suke a present for finally getting out of the hospital.

"Damn, now I wish I had brought my umbrella," whined Naruto quietly. He walked as fast as he could through the crowded street, almost dropping the flowers multiple times. Finally he got to Sasuke's house, and shaking himself off, walked in.

"Sasuke, where are you?" he called, but to his disappointment no one answered. He toured the house, just checking for any signs of life. When he reached the bedroom he found one. Sasuke was lying on the bed asleep. "You just got out of the fucking hospital, you had all the time in the world to sleep, why do you choose now!" Naruto sighed and began pacing around the bed in a bored manner.

"He chose now because that's what I told him to do." A voice he recognized said.

"Kakashi-Sensei, what're you doing here?" Their silver haired teacher had appeared suddenly in the chair behind him.

"I had to take Sasuke home. The instant he was out of the hospital he tracked me down and actually kind of found me in a compromising situation,"

"You mean Iruka-Sensei again, Kakashi-Sensei?" Naruto said dully.

"Yes, wait... no shut up and let me finish. Anyway, he made me recap what we did for the past 2 weeks, and then he asked me to teach him what I was doing."

"With Iruka-Sensei no doubt..."

"Stop that! And so then he was looking rather pale, and I think he either fainted, or had a heart attack, but either way, I ended up taking him back here. You don't seem to be the type who gives flowers, more the type who hits the person over the head for being out of commission for so long." Kakashi said in a bemused voice.

"I uh, j-just wanted to b-be nice, w-what's wrong with f-flowers?" Naruto stuttered.

"Oh nothing really, but the card attached to them was more what I was wondering about." He couldn't see through the mask, but Naruto could've sworn Kakashi was grinning. Shit, he's figured it out, thought Naruto, panicking slightly.

"What card Kakashi-Sensei?"

"The one that says: Glad you're better, love forever—Naruto Uzumaki."

"Fuck."

So he told him the whole story, and Hatake Kakashi became the 3rd person to know of their now not so secret love affair. Surprisingly he wasn't shocked or disgusted, as Sakura and Ino were. _He seems interested, which is actually kind of creepy_, thought Naruto.

"That's nothing to be ashamed of Naruto; it's perfectly natural sometimes." At this point Naruto showed Kakashi the door. "Just remember, you can't say…" SLAM. What you can't say without saying the word gay he wouldn't know, Sasuke had woken up. The slam was Kakashi getting the door in his face.

"I didn't think the old letcher would go that far, sorry Dobe," Sasuke sighed and hugged him. "So, what did he do to you?"

"Nothing, he saw the card I wrote you, he knows" He gave Sasuke the flowers and the card.

"It doesn't matter what he knows, aww, thanks Dobe," A few seconds later the flowers were in a jar, the card was on the table, and they were on the couch. Naruto grinned, this was definitely his Sasuke.

Sasuke was in top form, two weeks of rest had done him good. He pulled off Naruto's shirt, teasing his nipples. Naruto wriggled and set to work undoing Sasuke's pants. Sasuke grinned and helped, then off with Naruto's pants. Sasuke still blushed at the feel of Naruto's warm member against his own, and did so now. He realized Naruto hadn't been wearing any boxers, and blushed more.

"Whose turn is it this time Dobe?" Sasuke whispered.

"I think mine 'Suke…" Sasuke nodded and pulled off his own boxers, assuming the position. (Kudos to those who guess which position he went in.) Naruto got ready, some lube on his member, he rested it lightly at Sasuke's entrance.

"Ready," Sasuke mumbled, he personally didn't like it much, it hurt, but it was also kind of good feeling. As he thought that the first wave came, Naruto pushed in. This was only his second time being "on top" and he liked it. He moved out and in again, faster and harder than before, Sasuke cried out. Sasuke grabbed his own member and started pumping it. He moaned in synchronization with Naruto.

Naruto came first; Sasuke shuddered and sped up, feeling the warm cum leaking out. Then he came too, shouting Naruto's name, and outside a voice called his name too.

"Shit, I got here too late…." Ino muttered, she stormed off in a drunken fury, ranting and cursing. (I know you Ino bashers will love this.)

"Did you hear something?" Naruto asked, stroking Sasuke's member lovingly.

"No, I don't think so… Some drunk I guess," He sighed and kissed Naruto's cheek. "I missed that a lot…"

"I love you Sasuke," Naruto said bluntly.

"I-I love you to Naruto…" Sasuke smiled and kissed him. (I know it was short sex again, but, but…) Sasuke moaned, Naruto had taken his member in his mouth, sucking on the tip lightly, and then moving down the shaft. "Dobe, mmmmm that feels good…" A few moments went by, the suction noise slowing, Sasuke came again. Another few moments passed and they were both asleep.

In another part of town, on the roof of a tall building, Ino stood. Her face clenched. _What the fuck am I doing? _She thought miserably, staring down the side. _Is it worth it? Is he worth the pain and anguish I'm about to suffer?...Yes, yes he is! _

"TO FUCKING HELL WITH THE CONSEQUENCES!" she screamed, running as fast as she could for the edge of the roof, and leapt. A piercing scream rang through the night as she fell.

Naruto awoke violently from his sleep, Sasuke was shaking him. "What, what, I didn't do it, I blame….Oh, what the fuck Sasuke!" Sasuke looked oddly shaken.

"Ino, Ino tried to kill herself, Sakura just came by, she jumped off a roof, and she's dying. She left a suicide note and it included us being there…" Naruto blushed, thinking of that one night, still vivid. Then he paled, she was dying…

"I guess…I guess we have to go, don't we?" He wasn't anxious to see her again. They dressed quietly and went to the hospital. Sasuke mumbled a little about finally getting out and having to go back, until he saw Ino. It was obvious she had fallen from a great height, her skull was cracked, and her arms were twisted into odd forms. She was bleeding from the mouth and nose. What was worse was she was still conscious.

"N-n-Naruto, S-Sasuke…I-I'm sor….ry.. I….w-was…Drunk…It was s-s-stupid…I'm…d-dying, a-aren't I?" she at this point coughed, blood spurting from her mouth and skull. They nodded, mumbling yes. She closed her eyes tightly, opened them. They were unfocused and rolling from side to side. "I h-have t-t-tell you…N-Naruto….I…..L..Love you…" And with those parting words, her eyes closed again, forever this time.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Kakashi: Wow, that was kind of depressing. I was trying to avoid that but I have an idea…So, let's roll team!

Ino from the grave: I'm rolling. IN SAID GRAVE.

Kakashi: Oh shut up. Anyway, thanks ultra much again to my Beta, YaoiWriter2500, say hi to everybody.

YaoiWriter2500: Hey everyone, uh...READ TILL YOUR EYES BLEED!

**Anzu: Heh. Peace everybody!**


	5. The Break Up?

Kakashi: Okay, I'm sorry I took so damn fucking long. I just got back in school, I've been weighted down with homework and guy and girl trouble…And I'm now basically a suicide help line, but, other than that I'm just peachy.

Anzu: Ooooh, what happens, it's been ages!

Kakashi: Just read it. Sheeeesh. Okay, again, THANK YOU MY BETA, YaoiWriter2500. He rocks. Everyone bow down. Why aren't you bowing? Oh, and yes, I know Ino was a bit OOC, but hell, I needed a bump in the story, thank you, please don't remind me.

Ino's funeral was a long and dragged out event, and the rain didn't help. The whole time Naruto was thinking. Not just sadness, but of death, and loss. He was a ninja, on a mission at any time, he could die, or Sasuke, or Sakura! He shivered at the thought. Although there was another thought, it was the one scratching at the back of his head since the incident. Ino's parting words, her final words.

"I love you," Sasuke said, as the funeral was ending. Naruto didn't hear at first, but then said.

"I love you too…Sasuke? What…What would you do if I died?" Sasuke looked shocked at first, and then thought for a moment.

"I don't know what I'd do…I would….I just don't know Naruto," Sasuke blinked away tears at the thought, and then re-focused himself with a shake of his head.

"I…I don't know either…Damn…" Naruto sighed and hugged him lightly, gaining strange looks from some. Sasuke hugged him back, but at the same time, a few thoughts were passing through his mind too. _Had Naruto been having an affair with Ino? No, that's impossible; Naruto is gayer than those guys on Queer Eye for the Straight Guy. **(XD I'm sorry, I just had to.)** In either account, I don't know Naruto as well as I thought I did._

That night was tense, Sasuke seemed on edge, and Naruto didn't want to push his luck.

"Dobe…?"

"Yes Teme?"

"Why did, why did Ino say that to you?" Naruto looked flustered for a second, but then shrugged.

"I really don't know, maybe delirium? There was that one time though, she attacked me as I left the hospital, and she said after if I had tried anything else then it meant I didn't really love you. She said it was a test, but I didn't believe her. You know how weird girls are, I mean seriously," He shrugged again and nuzzled Sasuke, who brushed him off.

"She, attacked you?"

"Oh, not like with a kunai, I mean like, with a kiss and stuff."

"You….Made out….With Ino?" Sasuke looked angry, and Naruto cowered.

"Shit, it wasn't on purpose 'Suke, she just grabbed me, I swear, I didn't do anything!" Sasuke was still glaring. Then he turned and stormed out, then came back in looking a little calmer.

"Okay, so, she's a slut, fine, I already figured that."

"Hey, 'Suke, respect the dead!"

"Fuck respect, I'll spit on her grave if I want!"

"You know you don't mean that," Naruto said, glaring a little himself.

"I don't know anything right now, I believe you but I don't believe you. It's complicated, don't make it worse." Naruto blinked, outraged slightly.

"What, just because I'm the "screw up" everywhere else, doesn't mean you have to say it too! When the hell did you get so high and mighty!"

"When I found out you cheated on me! It gives me a right to be a jack ass!" Sasuke sighed and shook his head. "This is ridiculous; I can't even BELIVE we're having this argument!"

"Neither can I, she's dead and it doesn't matter what I did or didn't do."

"So you admit you did something!"

"Oh give it a rest already, you know I love you and only you 'Suke!" Sasuke sighed again and shook his head.

"I know, I know, but…Naruto, can you stay at your house for tonight, I just, I don't want to tempt you when I'm in a bad mood, and…." Naruto looked at Sasuke, a miserable, I'm just trying to do the right thing, face on. Naruto shrugged and grabbed his toothbrush.

"Fine, I understand Sasuke, but…If you change your mind or your opinion, you know where I am," Naruto sniffled lightly, and then walked out.

"Thank….Oh who am I kidding, he's gone…And after tonight if he ever comes back I'll be lucky…Why do I have to be so fucking jealous and paranoid?" Sasuke stripped and crawled under the sheets miserably, feeling lonely in the giant bed without his Dobe.

On the other side of town Naruto had the same feeling of loneliness, only with a smaller bed. He thought about it meekly: _Why did Sasuke have to be such a jerk? He should know I would never cheat on him... Why did I have to make such a big deal about it?_ He hugged his pillow, kissing it softly, imagining it was Sasuke.** (I know you losers have to get your dose of written porn somehow.)** Then, probably habit, reached down, stroking himself lightly down the length, moaning**. (I feel pathetic though. I'm writing from experience for once. XD I finally found a use for masturbating.) **He tightened his grip, moving it faster, up and down his shaft, stopping and starting, denying himself an orgasm.

A noise in the background startled him and he stopped, looking around, it was Sasuke!

"You're never going to get anywhere if you keep stopping Dobe," he grinned in an almost drugged way. "Let me help you hmmm?" a blush crossed Naruto's face.

"No, wait yes, no, no; you wouldn't believe me about Ino! Why should I let you do anything?" Naruto then moaned, as he was speaking Sasuke had walked closer, and as he finished talking Sasuke had put his mouth gingerly around Naruto's member. "Ooh, that feels nice…." Naruto moaned again, Sasuke going all the way down, swirling it lightly in his mouth. Another moan came from behind them, and the click of a video camera. **(Yes there are video cameras in this dimension. Shut up.) **Naruto looked up and spotted….

"You Kakashi are a fucking son of a bitch pervert!"

"Don't talk to your sensei that way, I was just passing by and saw poor Sasuke all alone, and I thought, maybe a little, erm, drugging would help his suffering."

"So you thought you'd also video tape it?" with a glare and the flash of a scroll the video camera was destroyed. "You are a slimy pedophiliac piece of shit! You're our teacher, how could you!" Naruto grimaced and pushed Sasuke off of him. "Wake up!" he said, slapping Sasuke. He promptly woke up and with a shout of shock kicked Kakashi down the stairs. **(Ah my poor perverted Kakashi, I will miss your antics…) **

"He didn't do what I think he did, did he?" Sasuke groaned, staring at the dust of the video camera.

"I'm afraid so. But, at any rate he's gone now…" Sasuke nodded grimly and stared at Naruto. "What?" Sasuke grinned and laughed.

"Pull up your pants Dobe, I can't keep a straight face," Naruto moaned at the pun and pulled them up, Sasuke was still grinning.

"What now?"

"Nothing, just thinking,"

"Care to share your thoughts with the class?" Naruto said shyly.

"I'm thinking two things, one, I'm such a pathetic jealous loser. Two, I'm thinking I'm so, so, so sorry, and three I'm thinking you should've left your pants down," Sasuke smiled again and with a swift movement helped fulfill that final thought. Naruto blushed and kissed Sasuke.

"Niiice Teme," Naruto said, pulling Sasuke towards the bed eagerly.

Kakashi: When I first started this chapter like a week ago or something it was 300 words and that was going to be it. Now, 1100 words later I feel I'm glad I waited, I like this chapter for personal authory things. It may be a bit OOC, it may be not what you were looking for, it may completely turn you all off to my writing, but I liked it.

Anzu: And that's what we love about you. You're so pathetically accepting.

Kakashi: twitches. Only I get to call myself pathetic, and now a word from our sponsor.

YaoiWriter2500: Hey, I'm not the sponsor, just the beta.

Kakashi: Close enough, now our real sponsor.

Kakashi663. Chat Land revival, join now, to chat it up whenever!


	6. Showering, Shopping, And Sad Memories

Kakashi: Wowwww, it's been a long time. I totally got stuck with school.

Sakura: I've been hiding in a storage closet for like….What, 11 months? You're a bonehead!

Kakashi: I was busy with school dammit!

Anzu: Yeah…..School….Whatever….

Kakashi: cries My girls are abandoning me!!

Anzu: I'll stay if I get a raise.

Kakashi: Fiiiine. Oh, and by the way, no sex in this chappy, sorry folks.

Sakura: Yay!!!

Kakashi: Erm, anyway, on with the story.

* * *

The sound of lukewarm water splashing tile and naked skin filtered through the door to Sasuke's ears. He was lying on his bed listening to his boyfriend Naruto showering, and weirdly enjoying it. They had become even closer after the incident. They had forgiven Kakashi, but his camera was still sitting in the shame corner, its lens broken and the screen shattered. If they look like a pervert, and act like a pervert, they almost always **are** a pervert.

Sasuke sighed contently, sitting up. He stretched and grimaced, a terrible noise emanated from the direction of the bathroom.

"I don't mind you coming here, and wasting all my time," Naruto was singing The Cars, in the shower again. If there was one thing he'd change about Naruto, but no, he had it good and easy with that silly and oh so girlish fox. He stood up and bounced off the bed, strolling across the hallway and into the bathroom.

"Dobe, you okay? Oh, sorry it sounded like someone was strangling you."

"Very funny Teme, every time you sing I think the same thing."

"I'll give you a quickie if you shut the fuck up." Naruto grinned; he'd gotten his way again. Little brat, Sasuke thought, I'll have to punish him for that. He pulled off his night shirt and boxers and climbed in, hugging Naruto close. Sweet nothings are really sweet somethings when you're in love.

Naruto nuzzled against Sasuke's chest, small but still manly, and Sasuke blushed, kissing the top of his head.

"I love you Dobe." Sasuke whispered.

"I know…Hey, 'Suke? Do you feel bad about Ino?"

"Feel bad about what? She's dead, sure, I'm sorry for her, but I mean…It wasn't my fault she was screwed up."

"Teme, that's so mean, she really liked me, and I went with you. Don't you feel like it might have been a mistake? I mean I love you more than my own life, but for the sake of others?"

"Where'd you learn to make speeches Dobe?" Sasuke smiled, hoping it would slide into the direction of more pleasant conversation, like, oh that feels so good, and harder, oh god oh god, harder. But Naruto glared.

"Damn it Sasuke, be serious..."

"Yes, I feel horrible about her, but what does it matter? We already went over this, and remember where it ended?"

"Yeah, I remember…Alright, I'm sorry 'Suke. Please, forget I mentioned it. I seriously need an orgasm now hon." Sasuke blinked at the rapid change of the conversation. Then he smiled the smile that had made Naruto fall in love with him. And Naruto kissed those smiling lips, passion locking them together for a homo Hallmark card.

A half an hour later Naruto stepped out of the shower, still wet, but in a sticky way. Sasuke came out just after him, in all respects. **(There, a sex joke for y'all)**

"You were fast today Dobe, it really sucked for me, I didn't get enough time with you." **(Okay, that's the last sex joke. No really)**

"Yeah, I'm sorry. When you dropped the soap, well, I just got overexcited." **(Dammit, stop it!!)**

"I'm strangely okay with it." Sasuke kissed him again and pulled on his boxers with a bit of difficulty. Naruto blushed and giggled, staring at Sasuke's erection poking out through his boxers. The phone rang suddenly, startling him and he almost tripped on his own boxers.

"Damn phone, who the fuck is calling?" Naruto shouted; his usual melodrama when he embarrassed himself in front of Sasuke. He bolted out the door, his boxers barely on.

"Hello…" Naruto said grimly, picking up the phone. "Oh, hey Sakura, what's up? Yeah I'm free for shopping, but can 'Suke come?" Sasuke walked in, loudly asking who it was, and Naruto mouthed "Sakura". "Oh, just me this time huh? Alright, let me ask him if it's okay. No he's not my mother dammit."

"What's she want?"

"She wants to go shopping with me, and I wanted to ask if it was cool if I went alone?"

"You and girls, just get the damned operation, I'll deal with it."

"Shut the fuck up, no, not you Sakura, Sasuke is being an ass. Alright, I'll be there in a bit. Yeah, see ya." Naruto tackled Sasuke, kissing him roughly. "Stay quiet when I'm on the phone!"

"Fine you big baby, go shop. Get like, a kimono or something, we can do some role-play you like so much."

"Ooooh, really 'Suke?"

"Yeah really." He rolled his eyes and gave him a kiss, and then shoved him off.

20 minutes later Naruto and Sakura were off, he was bright and cheery having drowned 13 cups of coffee. Caffeine and he were good friends. Sakura on the other hand was gloomy and dejected, she stared blankly at him.

Her Inner Sakura was yelling at her. "What the fuck are you doing talking to Naruto about this??!?! He's an idiot!" But, she interjected, he was the one Ino loved. "So what," Inner Sakura yelled, "he's still an idiot!" And like usual she ignored her better half's suggestions and ran ahead to catch up with Naruto. **(Jesus, she bad mouths him pretty badly considering she's not even a main character. She's gonna be one though, I'm sorry Sakura bashers)**

"So where are we gonna hit first, Uzui's Sandals, I really need some new ones, or we could go to Saiaharas, I wanted to get a kimono, 'Suke is letting me do my fetish for once." Again Sakura stared at him blankly.

"Your fetish is him in a kimono?"

"No, role-play, and I'm the one in a kimono. He wears a bikini."

"I don't even want to know. But Naruto, what I really wanted to talk about was Ino."

"Damn, I'm psychic Sakura; I was just talking to Sasuke about her. I felt bad about her and me, and stuff."

"Well that's what I wanted to talk to you about. I'm having a really hard time letting go. She was my nemesis, right, but she was also, like my best friend."

"And I'm the next best thing? A Sasuke lover and a girly shopping fun time boy?"

"When you put it like that it makes it sound so wrong, but that is pretty much it."

"I know what you're talking about Sakura; she was actually starting to be a bit of a friend to me too. Course, she wanted to be more than, and honestly unless it's a one nighter threesome I'm not much into girls. Sasuke, well, he's gayer than…Well frankly Michael Jackson." **(Okay, sleep deprivation is getting to me, but M.J. exists in Naruto world now.)**

Sakura stared at him for the fourth time, her eyes narrowing. He **is** an idiot; she thought depression ebbing into her soul.

"Good to know. Wait, what am I saying, ewwwww, Naruto. Michael Jackson? Okay, not the point, will you be her replacement?"

Naruto stared back at her now.

"Or, at least someone I can talk to on occasion?" Sakura stared at him harder, her eyes dark with sadness and too many spilt tears.

"I…uh…"

* * *

Kakashi: Wow. I think that was one of my better ones, no?

Sakura: Aww, on second thought Naruto is almost kinda cute.

Kakashi: I've got to admit honestly that when I start writing a chapter I have no idea where it's going, what'll happen, or how it'll end. I make it up as the inspiration hits me.

Anzu: If it works, right?

Kakashi: That's what I'm saying, right?

Sakura: Whatever.

Kakashi: Anyway, now a word from our sponsors!

Chat Land Spokesman: We've re opened chat land at a new site. Chatland2. Please come by, we'd love to talk to you.

Kakashi: See ya next time, for the seventh installation of the NaruXSasu epic, First Date Start Late (By the by, suggestions for a new name? It worked as a one shot, but now it needs something better. Please send in your thoughts.)


	7. The Bathroom Scene

Kakashi: Hey y'all, me again I'm writing the short prologue to First Date(still looking for a better title) it's a one shot, for once, so that should come out later today or tomorrow.

Anzu: Sounds great.

Sakura: Darn you Kakashi, just get to the story!!

Kakashi: Oh shush, I thought you quit in the like the third chapter!

Sakura: Yeah… I'm not good at not being included.

Anzu: (It's her big forehead.)

Sakura: I heard that!!

Kakashi: AGH!! Anyway it's time to go on with the story.

* * *

"Uh, hey, look at the time, I gotta go…Do something…Great shopping with you Sakura, let's do it again sometime." Stuttered the shocked blonde. He'd been expecting to just randomly talk about her; maybe they'd ignore it and just go shopping. He hadn't expected Sakura to ask him to "replace" Ino. The mere thought was ridiculous. What was Sakura thinking? Naruto turned and ran, he wasn't quite sure why.

It was a simple request, a bit nutty, but none the less it was just a stupid question. She was merely asking if he'd be her shopping buddy. But it felt like she'd just popped the question on him. It was a very scary thought. Maybe it was the guilt, maybe it was adrenaline, maybe it was the coffee, but he had run from Sakura. She was one of his teammates and occasional friends.

He burst through the door, almost knocking Sasuke off his feet.

"How'd it go Dobe?" he asked, a look of concern edging onto his somehow adult features. Naruto didn't answer; he just rushed back to the shower and stripped, stepping into the cold water. Maybe it was the guilt, maybe it was the adrenaline, maybe it was the coffee, but he cried. He cried about Ino, he cried about Sakura, he cried about everything. His 15 years of life, being hated by everyone in the village and finally finding people who loved him, and he'd managed to kill one of them off.

"Nice going, killer. Who's it gonna be next, Sakura? Kakashi? Or, oh god, Sasuke." He slowly dropped to the ground, leaning against the wall of the shower, tears streaming down his face. Sasuke had realized Naruto wanted space, but he knew his place was there, with him, and he timidly opened the door.

"Dobe, what's wrong?" He stared at him. He was soaking wet, nude, and red and puffy eyed, tears still streaming. "Oh god, Dobe!" He fast walked into the shower, fully clothed and getting wetter by the second.

"No, Sasuke, stay away, I'm bad luck. Every time I do something people die. I couldn't stand it if you died 'Suke, please."

"Oh Naruto, is that what this is about? Naruto it wasn't your fault, please stop crying." Sasuke hugged him tightly, his hair matting down in the constant downpour of cold water. "You didn't know, you couldn't have known! What happened with Sakura today?" Naruto slowly stopped crying, and coughing slightly told him.

"Sakura was talking to me about Ino…And she wanted me to replace her. Me! Because she loved me, and I was just like her, or something. She wanted her friend's killer to be her new best friend. And, I just couldn't answer her; I couldn't face up to it!"

"Sakura is a girl, an idiot girl with too many emotions for her own good." Sasuke stopped for a second and looked at him. "Okay, well, so are you, but still, she was an idiot to ask that of you. Don't feel bad, really it **wasn't** your fault!" **(Stupid Ino, she's dead and she's still giving me trouble. I hate writing sad scenes. I always cry, there I go again, I'm crying.)**

"I know but, I still feel bad. Oh no." he tightened his face into tears again. Down below in the doorway was Sakura, shouting apologies. "I want to know why she can't just leave us alone. Why does she have to do this to me?" The tromping of sympathetic feet echoed on the stairs, and she walked in. She blushed and turned away, she wanted to comfort Naruto, but kindness can wait for boxers.

"Why the fuck did you come here Sakura?! Look at what you did to him! Look at him damn it, modesty aside!" He got up, water dripping from the crevices in his shirt and pants and grabbed her, turning her around. "Look at him, he's a wreck! Why can't you just leave him alone about _fucking_ Ino? He thinks it's his fault, and that you're trying to prove it! Why do you hate Naruto so damn much?" Sakura flinched, crying harder. Seeing Sasuke yelling and getting so mad over that stupid fox demon incarnate was making her mad. She blinked away the tears, pausing to gather steam and finally she let loose her rage.

"I DON'T KNOW! I wanted to apologize to the stupid brat! But he won't deal with the real world, so next time I won't bother!! I was starting to actually like you Naruto! I thought you'd love to be my friend! I guess I made the mistake when I took an interest! Same to you Sasuke, I always loved you, and you never showed an interest in me! And then you start going out with him!"

"Guys, please, stop fighting!" Naruto had finally gotten up. He looked at them both, and hugged Sasuke. "Please, Sasuke, I get it now, I do. She only meant to be kind, and I'm an idiot for not believing her. I know it sounds crazy, but if you love me, you'll stop." Naruto's eyes watered again, his blue eyes shimmering in the forming pools of tears. His hair was everywhere, splashed across his face, and standing up in weird places. It was eyes that won Sasuke over. The innocence and pain that he could sense through those beautiful blue eyes washed over him and he hugged Naruto back.

"I love you Naruto, more than anything in the world." He pulled away, still holding Naruto's hand. "I'm sorry Sakura. When I saw him the way he was, I just snapped. Please, can you leave for now? I swear to Naruto that I'm sorry for you and your loss. And if you want… God it feels wrong saying this to someone I was just yelling at, but I'll go shopping with you two sometime." **(The power of love is amazing. I know it's a big turnaround, but god almighty as my witness I've seen this happen. Give your friends a hug next time you see them.)**

"Thank you Sasuke. I…I would love that…" Sakura bowed stupidly and slowly walked out of the room.

"And thank you Sasuke, I love you…You stood up for me, you apologized for me. You're kinda my bitch now." He managed a weak grin and kissed him. "Please Sasuke, don't ever leave me. If you do my heart will be broken."

"Don't worry Dobe…I swear I won't…" Sasuke kissed him back and sighed. Finally he was happy.

* * *

Kakashi: God, I'm so tempted to end it here. I'll probably do more to it, but I'd like your opinions. I mean, I love writing this story. But I'd also like to do more stories. I'm definitely doing the prologue to this, but I mean. Ya know?

Anzu: Yeah, I know what you mean Kakashi. Readers, please send in your comments. Every single one of them is appreciated.

Kakashi: It's true; I've read all of them. Thank you guys.

Sakura: crying

Anzu: Well, see you next time!

Kakashi: Please continue to read! Be ready for the possible eighth installment of First Date!


	8. Beach Fun

Kakashi: Hey all. It's time for the happy dance, because it's chapter 8!

Anzu: Big deal.

Sakura: Meh.

Kakashi: You guys suck at this. By the by everybody, the prologue is up, checkit, checkit out, yeaaaah.

Anzu: (Don't mind him, he's wired on Coke. Well, Diet Coke, but still, the caffeine is psyching him up.)

Kakashi: I'm not as think as you drunk I am.

* * *

"I don't know why I'm doing this."

"It's cause you love me 'Suke."

"Yeah, well, love only goes so far. I'm not wearing a bikini in public."

"Pshaw Teme, get over it and put it on." Naruto grinned, handing Sasuke the bikini.

"No Dobe! I'm not going then!"

"Fine, I'll wear it." He blushed and started stripping. First his shirt, then his pants and boxers. "Gimme the bikini." Sasuke rolled his eyes, but then looked down.

"God damn you, put that thing away before I'm horny, oop, there it goes. I'm horny." Naruto laughed and kissed Sasuke.

"I love turning you on." He kissed him again, purposely rubbing his body against Sasuke. Then took the bikini, putting on the lower half first. Sasuke sighed disappointedly. Naruto tried putting on the top but couldn't tie the back. "Hey Sasuke, will you tie the top for me?"

"No dammit, I'm mad at you." Naruto put on his pouty face and kneeled down in front of Sasuke, grinning.

"Please? What if I do…This?" He started unbuttoning Sasuke's pants and nuzzled against the length.

"Ohh god, fine, I'll tie the top!" He ignored Sasuke, wrapping his mouth around it, moving up and down along the length. Sasuke moaned, and gently stroked Naruto's hair, moaning the whole time. And then the door burst open, Sakura burst in with a smile.

"Hey guys, we going to the beach or wha…" She stopped dead mid sentence. Naruto let go of Sasuke and stood up. Sasuke gasped in pleasure and shock.

"Uh, heeeyyy Sakura. How're you?" Naruto stammered. Sasuke was still staring transfixed, his pants still unzipped.

"I was fine…" She stared down at Sasuke, and then her eyes shifted to Naruto. "What the fuck are you wearing?"

"Oh, a bikini. Sasuke wouldn't wear it so I decided I'd wear it."

"So how did it lead up to a bj?" she blinked, Sasuke had finally zipped up his pants. "Actually, I don't wanna know."

"Uhm. I think we should probably go." Sasuke said blankly. They all nodded.

They walked to the beach a bit lethargically, all still being a bit traumatized. As they neared the beach Naruto suddenly got charged up, and he asked if he could talk to Sakura while she was changing, as she hadn't changed yet.

"I guess, but can't you just say it?"

"No and no listening in Sasuke!"

"I won't Dobe."

"Okay, then we're all settled." Naruto smiled, cheering up considerably. They both walked in and Naruto began yakking immediately.

"So anyway Sakura, sorry you had to come in and see that and stuff, we usually only do that at night, y'know? But anyway, I really wanted to talk to you about something really important." Sakura nodded occasionally, she had taken off her shirt and was taking off her bra as he said this. He was looking right at her as the bra came off, her nipples showing boldly in the fluorescent light of the changing room, but he didn't blush or flinch. It put her off a bit that she could be half naked and not have someone compliment her boobs. But that's how gay he was, totally fine with it.

"Okay, sure, what is it?" she attached her top and pulled off her pants and was working on her panties when Naruto said the thing that sent her toppling head over feet.

"I want to propose to Sasuke, but I don't know how I should do it."

"Holy shit Naruto, really?"

"Yes. I'm completely sure of it. After what happened a month ago, it solidified it in my mind. Sasuke is the man for me. Hey, you're trimmed too!" She stared at him and then blushed. She put on her bottoms and then said:

"Trimmed? Oh…Naruto, not the time for bikini wax stories, you want to get hitched to Sasuke?!"

"Yeah, we've been together for like, a year and a half now, and I'm convinced." **(Weird as it sounds, it has been a year and a half in my mind, story wise.)**

"Oh my god, Naruto, that's awesome! What's the problem then?"

"I don't know how to like…Do it. Should I surprise him, or what?"

"Maybe just flat out propose on the beach today! Oh that would be awesome, right in front of the sunset, do you have the ring?"

"Yeah, I brought it just in case." He smiled and popped open a little box with a medium size ring, a beautiful diamond encased in the center.

"Sasuke's a lucky guy Naruto…I just wish I could have been with him."

"Aww, Sakura, I'm sorry. I forgot you're still in love with him."

"Well yeah, it's that, but still. Once I got past that you're actually a really nice guy. And I know that I can love him vicariously through you." she giggled and hugged him. "I'm so happy for you though Naruto!"

"Well, he hasn't said yes yet, but I'm pretty confident too."

Meanwhile on the beach a cloud passed over the shining sun of their lives. Something that would change the way they looked at each other for the rest of their lives. Gaara had just showed up on the beach, and he had some demon eyes on Sasuke.

"Hey there, my names Gaara. What's your name?" Subtlety was never Gaara's specialty.

"Oh, uh hello Gaara. I'm Uchihia Sasuke. Nice to meet you." Sasuke was already caught in Gaara's trap, the beautiful red hair, the love tattoo; even the cold yet shocking eyes had Sasuke captivated.

"Nice to meet you too Sasuke. I'm new to Konoha. I've been looking for someone who might be able to show me around town. Would you like to be that guy?"

"Oh, uhm. Yeah! But not right now. I'm waiting for my boyfriend."

"Oh my god, it's a good thing I ran into you." he bent in and whispered lightly into Sasuke's ear, sending chills down his spine. "I'm gay too."

"Oh, wow. That is a good thing." Sasuke was nervous; he was captivated by the odd beauty of Gaara. He'd been reduced to idiotic sentences.

"Hey Sasuke sweetie, what's up? Who's this dude?"

"Hello, my name is Gaara. I'm taking it you're the lucky bastard who got Sasuke here?"

"Damn straight. Well, damn not so straight. Something. My name is Uzumaki Naruto."

"I'm meeting so many kind people today. And who is this girl staring at us?"

"Oh, she's Sakura." Naruto mumbled. He too was awed by the boy's beauty, but he had remained unmoved. He's trying to take my Sasuke, thought Naruto glumly, well if it's a battle he wants he'll get it.

"The pleasure is yours entirely Sakura, I assure you." Gaara said smoothly.

"He's got nice manners Naruto; you could learn something from him." Sakura said, blushing.

"Yeah, I could teach him something too, but I'm gonna skip that for now."

"Oh Dobe, don't be so harsh."

"Whatever Teme."

"Well, I can see I'm not really wanted around here, but I'll see you later guys, nice meeting you all, and Sasuke, I'll want that tour of Konoha."

"Sure Gaara." And he walked off, already plotting diabolical things.

"I don't like him. He was trying to hit on you."

"No he wasn't, he's new here."

"Whatever Teme…" Naruto sighed, lying down next to Sasuke, hugging him. "I love you."

"I know…"

"I mean, love you more than my own life, and…Well..." he pulled the box from his trunks and Sasuke gasped. "Uchiha Sasuke, will you marry me?"

"Oh my god Naruto!" Sasuke stared at the ring, Sakura stared at Sasuke, and Naruto stared at Sasuke too. "I…Oh Dobe…I…Uhm…"

* * *

Kakashi: Whew. Fun stuff huh gang?

Sakura: Evil Gaara.

Anzu: Indeed.

Kakashi: It's almost like they're friends now… Scary. I'll see you all later!"


	9. Nightime Joy and Morning Love

Kakashi: Yay. Anyway, chapter 9!

Sakura: People have been ragging on Gaara, what's up with that?

Anzu: It's because he's trying to break Naru/Sasu up!

Kakashi: Anyway. It's been very hard for me to write these stories lately. I've used a lot of imagination up in the past few days, so if I take a while to get out a chapter then I apologize.

Anzu: He does apologize.

Kakashi: Haha. Yep. Sorry, that was a weird moment. Anyway, on with the story my friends.

* * *

"Yes, of course Naruto, I'll marry you." Sasuke blushed and grabbed him, kissing him roughly. Sakura blushed too and turned around. 

"Mhmm, oh Teme, I'm so happy!"

"I love you Dobe." Sasuke smiled and kissed him again. But then Sasuke shuddered and stopped, feeling eyes piercing him, demonic and heartless eyes.

"What's wrong sweetheart?"

"Oh, nothing I guess…Just thought I saw something." Sasuke shook his head and blinked. "Where were we?" Sasuke pushed against him, kissing hard.

**Later**

"So Gaara how was your first day in Konoha?" Temari bubbled.

"It was okay." Gaara mumbled. Temari hugged him and poked his chest.

"Meet any cute booooys?" Gaara blushed and elbowed her.

"So what if I did?"

"That's a yes. Who is he?"

"I'm not telling you anything Temari." Gaara glared at her and stormed off to his room.

**Even Later**

"Hey Sasuke…?"

"Yeah Dobe?"

"Does it feel weird to you now that we're engaged? You know?"

"I do Naruto…But it's a good weird, right?"

"Of course dude." Naruto was lying next to Sasuke, his hand placed gently on Sasuke's. The covers were wrinkled and spread out, wet, but warm and comforting. Naruto blushed and rolled over, resting on Sasuke's chest. "I love you more than anything in the world. And I'm going to love you more we're married." Sasuke kissed Naruto's neck lightly, hugging him closely. Naruto laid his head on Sasuke's chest, listening to his heart beat; a heart that he owned spiritually and blushed.

"What'cha doing down there sweetie?" Sasuke grinned and moved his hands up and down his back.

"I'm just listening to your heart beat. It's so soft and peaceful, I love it." Sasuke nodded and sighed, holding him tighter. And then again, he felt the demonic eyes peeking in on his soul. He shuddered and stared at the window. There was nothing but the tree that Sakura and Ino had climbed to watch them through. "What's wrong hon?"

"Oh, nothing. Just one of those shudders you get when you're seriously in love with someone."

"Aw Teme, that's so sweet!" Naruto blushed and kissed his nipple, resting his head back on his chest. "I love it when you talk like that."

Meanwhile in the Gaara residence…

"Gaara, where've you been?" Temari muttered, glaring at him.

"Out, exploring the fucking town. What business is it of yours?"

"Don't talk to me that way Gaara! Seriously, where were you? You were doing it again; you were stalking your new crush, weren't you!"

"No I wasn't!" And Gaara stepped past her, throwing himself onto his bed.

"Damn it Gaara, we moved to stop you from doing this!" Gaara covered his head with his pillow. "You can't hide from it forever you know!"

**Next Day**

"Oh Sasuke that was amazing last night…" Naruto cuddled him again and rested his head on his shoulder.

"Aw, thanks Dobe." Sasuke turned his head and stared at Naruto. "You look silly with your hair like that hon." He did, his blonde hair was matted in front of his eyes.

"Well you always look silly Teme."

"Whatever dude. Go drink your coffee; I want you jazzed up again man." He kissed his cheek and smiled, stroking his face.

"Yeah, yeah, I'll go." Naruto stood up and muttered under his breath as he pushed his hair out of his eyes. "Fucking coffee…" Sasuke grinned as he watched Naruto's naked ass walk out of the room, but then it turned to a frown. What was that weird feeling last night? Maybe it was because when they happened he was thinking, no, just remembering Gaara. He was freakishly beautiful and freakishly smooth and cool.

Naruto sighed and rolled his eyes as he walked down the stairs, picking up the boxers he dropped last night on the way up to Sasuke's bedroom. He giggled, thinking of last night and pulled them on. They were orange, like most everything he owned, but with little black shuriken flying on them. He stretched, opening the refrigerator and staring around for some milk.

"There's no god damned milk. Where is the god damned milk?" Naruto spotted the milk and a grabbed it, taking a couple sips straight from the container. He stood up and stared around, his eyes blurry still. He stopped and rubbed his eyes, and like a flash he saw something fly past the window, something red and black. He blinked and stared harder. "I'm starting to see things. That's fucked up."

He opened a cabinet and pulled out a cup and walked over to the machine, catching another glimpse through the window. And that was the last time he saw it. He blinked a few more times and decided it was his imagination.

Meanwhile in Sasuke's bedroom Sasuke was falling asleep again when someone crawled into bed with him.

"Hey Dobe…I love you baby…" He felt hands caress his stomach and member and he moaned. "Oh that feels sooo nice." The hands started to move up and down along his length and moaned again. The fingers felt different than usual though, they were smoother and less calloused.

"Sasuke?"

"Ohh, yes Dobe?"

"Who the fuck is that?" Sasuke was wide awake then.

"Holy shit! Gaara, what the FUCK are you doing here?!" Gaara grinned sheepishly and grabbed Sasuke around the waist.

"I'm not doing anything you don't like."

"Get the fuck off!" Sasuke shouted, shoving him off of him with a kick to the chest.

"Ow, but Sasuke, I thought you liked me?" Gaara grinned and tried to hug him again.

"I do, but I'm engaged to Naruto, and you've got to get off of me!!" Sasuke yelled. Meanwhile Naruto was staring at them with an awed yet somehow bemused look on his face.

"Noooo, you're mine god damn it!"

"I've known you for like, a day! Dude, what the fuck is wrong with you?!" Gaara fell to the floor.

"I…Don't know…" Gaara blinked, coming to his senses and running out the window.

"Dude…What the fuck was up with that?" Naruto said finally.

"I don't know hon, but it was messed up." Sasuke stared out the window and then sighed. "I'm sorry about that man…I knew I shouldn't have said anything yesterday."

"It's okay sweetie…It's not your fault. But I thought by now you'd know my hand's feeling." Sasuke laughed and hugged him.

"I love you hon."

"I do too. And I'll be damned if some psycho rapist breaks us up." Naruto grinned and kissed him.

Outside Gaara was standing at the base of the tree, panting.

"God damn it, I swear I'll make Sasuke mine…"

* * *

Kakashi: Damn this is getting harder each chapter.

Anzu: You should take a break.

Kakashi: No, I'm okay…Really…

Anzu: It's your health dude.

Kakashi: Yep. Anyway, I'll see you guys next time!


	10. Party Crashers!

Kakashi: Okay, I've been running out of ideas lately so last night I did a whole outline of what this chapters going to include, and then I spilled soda on it and considered killing someone, anyway I've got it all figured out.

Anzu: If you're going to kill someone kill Gaara, the fans have been seriously ragging on him.

Kakashi: I know…It saddens me…I'm adding two more characters, which ones you'll have to read to find out, because as much as you guys want just Sasuke and Naruto, there does need to be a story line. By the way, I'm writing a new story, KibaXNaru, so yeah. Please be as kind to it as you do this. (Completely unrelated though.)

Sakura: Why don't I get someone to be happy with?

Kakashi: Oh you do…Mwahahahahaha!!!

Sakura: That can't be good.

* * *

It had been a month since the Gaara incident, and it had all but slipped from Sasuke's memory until Temari and Gaara showed up with Sakura on his doorstep. Sakura had met Temari in the mall and had discovered she was Gaara's sister. Sakura also discovered Sasuke liked to close doors in her face when Gaara the stalker was near. **(There was a hint about Sakura's "happy someone" in this paragraph. Feel free to review and tell me who you think it is.)**

"God damn it Sakura, he's a freak!" Sakura rolled her eyes in that, boys are crazy fashion, and told Gaara and Temari that it was that time of the month for Sasuke. Temari shrugged and rolled her eyes in that, you're so right fashion, and told her Gaara was like that too.

Sasuke and Gaara looked at each other and both visibly shuddered.

"Girls." was the word they chose to describe the shudder. Suddenly Sasuke brightened.

"By the way Sakura, Naruto is having his bachelor party, and so am I, this Friday. His is at the Kiyuki Mora Bar, and mine is at the Haki." Sakura nodded and made a mental checklist.

"So I assume they're strip bars because Naruto wanted it that way?"

"No, actually that was my idea. Good to know you think so lowly of Naruto and his horniness though."

"Horny or not do I get to go? Maybe I can get a date for the wedding, hmm?"

"Of course, you're going to my party and uh…Temari, I suppose you can go to my party too."

"Oh, sure, thanks Sasuke." Temari thanked him and hit Gaara on the head. "God damn it Gaara, stay off of him!" Gaara had tried creeping up on Sasuke. "It's like having a dog that won't listen."

"I'm not a kid Temari!" and Gaara promptly ran away, no doubt to stalk from a further distance.

………..……………..

It was a loud party, and yet not a single person was talking. Yay for lap dances was the thought going around. Gaara stared jealously through the window, watching as a thin man in underwear rubbed against Sasuke.

"That should be me in there." Gaara mumbled, fogging the glass. He sat down and looked at his hands. They were smooth and pale white, a long scar going from his index finger to his wrist. A raised red scar was on the other hand, reaching from his palm up to his middle finger and back down to his wrist. And then he stood up, jumping silently to the roof and crawling across to the front entrance, dropping into a handstand in front of a doorman. "What do I have to do to get in?"

"ID and a pocket full of ones and fives."

"Shit, I forgot my ID."

"No entrance then."

"That sucks."

"Yes it does."

"No, for you."

"What? Aggh!" The door men cried out as he flew into the door, blood dripping slowly from his bottom lip. A deep footprint was embedded in his chest. Gaara had finally lost it. But he **had** found a way into Sasuke's party. Meanwhile in the strip bar across town Naruto shuddered, feeling something was terribly wrong. No one would notice he was gone, they were to busy staring at the stage to bother. And he took off running for the Haki.

Gaara stepped into the bar, spotting Sasuke and with a glare from across the room the man dancing on Sasuke was gone. Gaara grinned and revved up again, he was on a steep slope and he had no brakes.

"Hey Sasuke!" Gaara tackled him and put a hand over his mouth. "Quiet Sasuke, no talking unless I tell you too." He grinned and bared his growing fangs. Sasuke's eye's bulged and he fell silent. "Now you're coming into the back room with me, yes?" Sasuke's eyes went up and down and he stood up, following Gaara's direction.

"Is that Sasuke and Gaara?" Temari said to Sakura, turning her.

"No, it can't be."

"Then who the hell is that?"

"Oh no…"

Gaara slammed Sasuke into the wall, and he slid onto the couch. Gaara pressed his mouth against him, tonguing him hard.

"What the fuck are you doing Gaara?!" Temari and Naruto shouted. Naruto had slid into the back room as Temari and Sakura did, and he was pissed.

"He was kissing me you bitch, and he liked it."

"No I didn't!! Please, Naruto!" Naruto stared open mouthed and sighed. He turned and ran out of the room, slipping on the pool of blood around the doorman's head.

"Holy shit!" Naruto cried, scooting back from the body and ran again, not knowing where he was going. "Holy shit!" he cried again as he crashed into Kiba and Shikimaru.

"Naruto, what the hell are you running for?" Kiba shouted, standing up and pulling him to his feet. Shikimaru was taking advantage of being on the ground and snored quietly.

"I just…I don't know why I even bothered…He's always like this."

"Who, like what?"

"Sasuke, he was fucking making out with Gaara!"

"Always knew he was gay."

"He's my fiancée jack ass!"

"Always knew you were gay."

"It was at his bachelor party!"

"Then what the hell's the issue? That's what they're for, right? Getting laid by everyone before you're tied to one person." Kiba laughed and looked down at Shikimaru. "Wake up idiot…Shiki! SHIKI!" Kiba kicked him in the ribs and Shikimaru woke up abruptly, the second kick hitting him square in the face and knocking him out for real. "Shit…"

"What are you two doing out here?"

"We were going to a bar, you know me, sex, drugs, and booze."

"Isn't it sex, drugs, and rock and roll?"

"I'm more of a rap guy honestly." Naruto glared at him and rolled his eyes.

"Whatever dude, I need to go to a bar right now." **(In Naruto's world strip clubs and bars let you in 15 and above. Yes, I know it makes no sense. DON'T DRINK AND DRIVE.) **

"Want to come with us your highness?"

"Your highness?"

"I assumed you were a drag queen."

"Not funny. Dude, what the hell are you gonna do with Shiki?"

"Probably let you rape him, but for the moment I'm gonna carry him to the bar. Lazy ass mother fucker."

--**Back at the Strip Club--**

Sasuke was sitting on the couch still, his head in his hands and his knees curled up underneath him. Sasuke was not one to assume the semi fetal position, but today he felt he had reason. He had practically been raped, and his fiancée had seen it happen.

Gaara had attempted said rape, and since then he had been basically brow beaten and yelled at by two very angry women who were horny from male strippers and the fact that they were so much alike. They had formed a bond out of their alikeness, and were rapidly becoming closer than most people assumed.

"That was messed up Gaara!" Sakura and Temari echoed, redundantly telling him the uselessness of his actions. Then once more he received his rev up, he had hit the jump at the bottom of the slope and he had lost control of the wheel once more. He stood up, smacking Sakura away from him and ran out the door, treading on the waking doorman, and this time, killing him. Gaara had just become a murderer on the loose.

Meanwhile Naruto and Kiba were seated at a random bar; Naruto was spinning in his seat and drinking a beer. It was one of the twelve different glasses on the table, all Naruto's. He hiccupped and laid his head on the table, his eyes spinning.

"Thank you for this…hic…Kiba…You're a good guy…"

"You might want to stop while you're ahead there Naruto, you're gonna have a hell of a hangover."

"I don't give a….fuck…I just wanna get drunker." And he promptly fell asleep.

"Pshaw, there's a dude who can't hold his beer." Shiki said, waking up as Naruto's peaceful breathing echoed inside of an empty glass. He smiled in his sleep, blushing lightly.

"He's in a better place now Shiki."

"My face hurts. What'd you do to me?"

"Nothing…"

* * *

Kakashi: Wow that was a pain in the ass to write.. Yay, Gaara's gonna…Erm. Never mind. 

Sakura: Am I a lesbian?

Kakashi: Maaaaybe.

Sakura: Damn it Kakashi! Not everyone is gay!!!

Kakashi: I said maybe you psychotic pink haired bitch! Get off of meeeeee!

-Later-

Anzu: Sakura is taking a vacation, how long it will be is up to the judge, of course we expect she'll be let off with insanity, but looking at the judicial system these days(e.g. the Paris Hilton Case) who knows when she'll be out. Anyway, Kakashi, tell them what that means!

Kakashi: Sasuke is our host next time, look forward to it everybody!

Anzu: See you next time guys!!


	11. Hangover Hell

Kakashi: Yay drunken stupors and fan reviewers! Next time if you review I include you in this skit! Yes, it's a cheap trick, but I'll live with myself!

Anzu: Anyway, introducing our new host until Sakura gets out of jail (case still pending.).

Sasuke: Uh…Hi…

Kakashi: Don't be shy, introduce yourself!

Sasuke: Uh…Hi…I'm Sasuke…Nice to meet you all…Kakashi is a voyeur who writes down what I do with my free time.

Kakashi: Uhm…Heh…Story time, roll cameras!!!

* * *

Hangovers are god's revenge for making alcohol, was Naruto's thought as he woke up, only half conscious through the stupor of blinding pain. Last night was his bachelor party, and he'd walked in on his fiancée making out with a rapist. Needless to say he got smashed, and he got smashed in good company. Kiba and Shikimaru were also waking up, with hangovers that made a kunai through the head feel like an orgasm.

"Where am I?" mumbled Naruto.

"I don't know where you are but I think I died last night and went to hell." was Kiba's opening statement.

"I don't think even hell is this bad." was Shikimaru's sentiment.

"Who are you guys?" Naruto said tiredly, rubbing his eyes and yawning.

"I'm not sure who the guy next to me is, but my name is like…Tad? No…Something like that…Kiba! That's the one." Kiba muttered, elbowing Shikimaru in the ribs.

"I don't think I have a name." Shikimaru said, elbowing Kiba back, and then his head dropped onto Kiba's lap, falling asleep again. This woke up Kiba abruptly; Shikimaru's head was heavy and very well aimed.

"Oh god, that was fun last night…" and then Naruto gasped, slapping his forehead. "Fuck, I left Sasuke at that bar…"

"Fuck Sasuke on your own time, I ain't no fag." Kiba said blandly.

"But, aren't we going out doggy boy?" Shikimaru asked from under the table. Kiba sighed and for about the ninth time kicked Shikimaru into unconsciousness. Naruto laughed and stood up, waved at Kiba, and staggered out the door. **(Kiba and Shiki come back later, don't worry. They're my drinking buddies, so they owe me.)**

………….

"Where am I?" was also the first words out of Gaara's mouth. He was standing upright in a tree, staring down at Konoha. "Fuck, that's right…I killed that dude last night…" He blinked and jumped down to the ground, cracking the hard ground as he landed.

He had been at Sasuke's bachelor party when it had happened again. He had snapped, seen red, gone crazy, had lost it. He had kicked a guy's chest in then crushed his face. He was a murderer, and he was still at large. He stared down at his bloodied boots, and shook his head, tears flying from his eyes. He had only meant to knock him out, get to Sasuke, but now he was screwed; and not in a good way.

"I have to go to Temari…She'll help me…" Or will she? Gaara questioned himself vigorously, and shook his head again. She could not be trusted, he would be locked away forever, or worse yet, be killed. So he stretched out his arms and legs, grabbed the pack he had attached to his leg and looked through it. He found the picture of Temari and threw it, it embedded itself in a tree up to her neck. He found the picture of Sasuke he had stolen from his apartment and sliced his arm open, blood gushing silently from the wound.

Usually the red blood would make him lustful, now it only disgusted him. He took the picture and kissed it, then shoved it into the wound, and sealed the cut. Only a ridge in his arm remained to prove he even had the picture. He would keep Sasuke close to him forever. He grinned, baring his fangs brutishly and re-attached his pack. He turned his back on Konoha and ran, hopping from tree to tree, swinging on the branches and flipping to the next one. He didn't stop until he was two miles from Konoha and tired out. He collapsed to the ground and stopped. I won't do anything for a month, he thought, I'll lie here until it's blown over. And with that he blacked out. **(No, it's not the end of Gaara; I know you all wish it was though. He makes two more appearances though, so be prepared.)**

………….

His house had never felt lonelier. His bed had never felt emptier. His shower had never seemed so unexciting. His life had never been worse. Naruto wasn't there, and so it was miserable. Uchihia Sasuke sat on the roof of his mansion, staring at the garden beds along his walkway. He and Naruto had made out there once. He knew it was silly for him to be this miserable after only one night without Naruto, but he didn't care. He was miserable. He stood up and walked back to the trapdoor leading into his room.

The kitchen however was not empty, nor lonely. Sakura and Temari were both there and talking about the previous night's adventure. Sakura stared at Temari for a moment and rolled her eyes. She had been silly to consider asking Temari out. **(There Itachi's Lover, she's not gonna go out with her...Or, maybe she will…I'm not sure how it'll play out story wise yet.) **Temari stared back at her, considering how likely it was that Sakura asked her out. Zilch, thought Temari sadly.

"Hey, Sakura, Temari, why are you still here?"

"Oh we thought you'd be lonely. Plus you have great coffee." Sakura said semi sympathetically.

"You're a wonderful friend Sakura. Really. No, no, really."

"Oh, gee, this is the last time I'm nice to you then."

"That's fine with me."

"I'm going to let this shit slide because you're miserable, but you better apologize later you drama queen." Sakura grinned and turned back to Temari. "So about that tattoo, where is it?"

Sasuke walked out before he could find out. He knew where Temari's tattoo was. She had shown it to him much to his horror. Apparently it was not to Sakura's horror though, because he heard odd noises emanating from the kitchen a little later on. He could honestly say that was the most disturbing day of his life, in all respects. He knew what the noises were, both from personal experience, and from Naruto's screaming as he came in the door.

"GET OUUUUTTT!" Naruto screamed at them and then ran upstairs, tripping on the last step and sliding across the floor. Melodramatic as ever he began crying for Sasuke and in an even louder voice for his mommy.

"Hey Dobe, how're you doing?" Sasuke said, smirking, though he knew he should be apologizing. What did he have to apologize for though? He had been raped, he hadn't enjoyed that freak fest last night.

"I've got a hangover bigger than your horny button, and I just saw something god awful."

"Yeah, I heard. Who'd a guessed?"

"I dunno, but I'm afraid to go downstairs."

"Look, Naruto, about last night…"

"No need to explain Sasuke. I was drinking myself into a stupor last night, and I already forgave you. Speaking of which, where do we keep the orgasms, I seriously need one."

"No thoughts and pure pleasure for three seconds doesn't cure hangovers Dobers."

"I don't care. No thoughts, remember?"

"But there are masturbation headaches." **(I've had quite a few of those. Dammit, if I could just turn on a little more it wouldn't take a god damn hour and a half. I can nail one down in 30 seconds if I'm revved.)**

"I already have one, I'll live."

"Wouldn't you rather just have one with me Naruto?"

"Yeah, but right now I'm see three of you, and I don't know which one of you to fuck."

"That could be a problem. Come here ya idiot, I'll get you into bed." Naruto brightened and then realized as Sasuke chucked him onto the downy king sized bed that he didn't mean sex, but literally into the bed.

"Owwie…'Suke, come here and give me a back rub."

"Later…"

"Fine."

"I love you."

"I love you too."

"Night Dobe."

"Night Teme."

* * *

Kakashi: Offer still stands, review and I put you in my skit! And one of you lucky bastards gets a review on all of your stories. I will actually read them too!! So be on the look out for me on your story!!

Sasuke: Dude…Poor Gaara. He only wanted to screw me…

Kakashi: Dude, you're odd.

Anzu: By the way, I'm taking a vacation too, so next time is Kakashi, Kenshin, and Sasuke!

Kakashi: Yay!!! I love Kenshin! –huggles Kenshin- See ya next time guys!!! Peace out!


	12. Morning Fiasco

Kakashi: Hello again everybody, the monotony of Anzu and Sakura killed my spirit, but finally Sakura got arrested, and Anzu is on vacation, so my other co hosts today are Kenshin and Sasuke, yay them!

Kenshin: Oro?

Kakashi: You're a host, remember?

Kenshin: No I don't...Oh well, this one is honored anyway.

Sasuke: He's not right in the head, is he?

Kakashi: Not really.

* * *

It was Tuesday, it was Wednesday, and it was Thursday. The days were going by quickly. Sasuke, Naruto, Sakura, and Temari had all been questioned. They'd been roasted over hot coals of guilt, depression, and loneliness. And finally it was over; they had no idea where Gaara was. They had nothing to do with the murder, and they were all released. **(By the way, I think I pissed off readers with my Saku/Tema joke at the end of the last chapter. I'm sorry, pretend it didn't happen and I won't do that again. Okay? Okay?)**

Peaceful silence washed over Sasuke's mansion Friday morning. Sasuke was resting on his stomach, his head turned to his left. It was the only way he could sleep, mainly because Naruto always slept on the left side of the bed. He reached out his hand and stroked Naruto's face, Naruto didn't stir. He was ridiculously cute laying there next to him, completely naked and without a blanket. Sasuke had stolen it, he got cold and Naruto never noticed. It also helped him get off in the morning.

Sasuke shuddered, he was still cold. He threw half the blanket over Naruto's body and pulled himself closely against Naruto and was instantly warmed.He blushed and kissed Naruto's nose. Sasuke always acted tough, but he had a soft, fluffy side that only Naruto knew about. Naruto blushed too, he was awake; he always was awake before Sasuke, but had faked being asleep. Sasuke getting off always got Naruto off in the morning. **(Ahahaha, these two are seriously idiots. And since I write about them I guess I'm an idiot too. Oh well.) **

Sakura was staying with Sasuke and Naruto for the weekend. Her parents were mad at her for being involved with a murder, and so she was kicked out. She sighed as she stared out the window of the kitchen, nothing but mansions and trees for miles. Sakura opened the window, a cool breeze brushing against her face. It felt good after being cooped up all night with the heater on. Sasuke is so cold intolerant; she thought dully and opened the refrigerator. There was nothing but milk and diet coke.

"They seriously need to shop more…" She pulled out a diet coke and popped the lid. It fizzed out of the top slightly and she sipped away the foam. "Well, grocery shopping anyway. Jesus, they shop more than the average gay guy."

"And who says I'm an average gay guy Sakura?" Naruto said, tapping her on the shoulder.

"Holy shit, where'd you come from?" **(Yay for accidental sex jokes! I'm so perverted. Kudos and cookies to whoever counts how many sex jokes I make in the next two paragraphs!)**

"Where I come from is none of your business. It's Sasuke's."

"I'll bet. He's who you come to though, but where did you come from?"

"Bed with 'Suke. I left him in a bit of a sticky situation, so he's gonna take a shower." Naruto grinned and then looked at her again, Sakura was blushing and giggling. He looked down. "Shit! Where'd my boxers go?" Sakura sighed and rolled her eyes, she was used to him going around naked and not realizing it.

"I believe Sasuke's got them."

"But Sasuke is in the shower."

"So you think Dobe!" Sasuke laughed and tackled Naruto, they fell to the ground.

"Holy damn, you got into my coffee stash didn't you?" Sasuke nodded and kissed him roughly. Sakura looked away, then turned to look at them again, then closed her eyes.

"Uhm, should I leave?"

"Well unless you're going to get a video camera, I think we're pretty much done here." Naruto said, pouting. He still had no idea where the hell his boxers were.

"Aww, Dobe, you're so much fun at night, why must you be so stingy in the daylight hours? For doth not the light make you so much more divine?"

"You've been reading Shakespeare again haven't you?"

"No, I got a new thesaurus to figure out what Sakura and Temari were saying the other night."

"Ah, and what were they saying?"

"Basically? What the fuck are you doing, what the fuck is wrong with you, and why the fuck are you still here."

"That is not what we were saying!" Sakura interjected, poking Sasuke in the ribs.

"Whatever. When are your parents taking you back, I want to make love to my Doberoo here. And well, you're kind of in the way…"

"Monday is when they said they'd consider taking me back."

"So you'll be here forever, huh?"

"Probably."

"That sucks."

"Yep."

"I want to suck, go in the other room god damn it!" Naruto yelled, interrupting the dying conversation.

"It's okay Naruto, later tonight you can suck all you want."

"Okay, **so** didn't need to know that!" Sakura shouted. Naruto laughed and then began pouting again.

"What did you do with my boxers Sasuke?" Sasuke handed him some black and red boxers. "Thank you." Naruto said, and tried to pull them on while hiding his manhood. He failed miserably and fell over, and Sakura giggled.

"You two are idiots!!" she said through the laughter and ran out of the room.

……………….

"So, I met up with Kiba and Shiki the other night, we should go hang out with them!"

"Those two jackasses?"

"Yeah! They paid for drinks last time and everything!"

"That's probably because you were passed out on the table. Or so they told me."

"You talked to them?"

"Yeah I ran into them at a bar when I was looking for you. Shiki was under the table with a bloody nose and Kiba and making out with that dog of his."

"Ewwwww."

"That's what I said." Sasuke said, and then winced; he had noticed Kiba coming up rapidly behind them.

"Hello losers, what're you two up too?"

"We were wondering if you and Shiki would join us on a couples date." Sasuke grinned.

"I'm not going out with Shikimaru damn it!"

"Right…So what's with the heart locket around your neck with Shiki Forever on it?" Naruto said boldly.

"I'm not wearing that locket today!" Kiba's eyes bulged and then he smacked his forehead. "You tricked me!"

"So it's a date?" Naruto insisted.

"No it is not a date!"

"You sure? We'll even pay for it." Sasuke held his grin and elbowed Kiba. "Trust me; you need to get out more."

"Well. If you'll pay for it I suppose I could spare an hour or two…"

"Well then, we'll see you at seven-ish, Hora Kinta's Sushi Land."

"I swear if you say anything about this too anyone I'll kill you!"

"We won't." Naruto giggled, and then noticed the seriousness of Sasuke's words stopped and put his hand over his heart.

"No, we won't tell a soul!"

"Then we'll see you at seven."

"Good."

* * *

Kakashi: Yay! Whew. Done! Damn, that was short…I'm going to have to extend the skit a bit, I thought it was longer…Hmmm…

Ashley: Hello.

Kakashi: That's how we'll do it, introducing one of my good fans and very kind personage, Ashley-iloveme5895!

Ashley: Uh, go Sasu/Naru!

Kakashi: Okay…Not knowing what she'd say I have to kinda fake her a bit…Hmmm…

Ashley: You're such an author. Always making a big deal out of stupid things.

Kakashi: She's more like my conscience then I intended…

Kenshin: That was a good chapter I guess Kakashi.

Kakashi: "I guess"?!?!?!

Sasuke: Uh, guys?

Kenshin: Well what do I know about writing? You suck for all I know!

Kakashi: It's go time bitch!

Kenshin: Amakeru No Hiruyuki!!!

Kakashi: Agggghhhh!!!

Sasuke: Uhm…We'll see you next time everybody! Uh…Master Kakashi? Hello? I thought you didn't kill anymore Kenshin!

Kenshin: I don't, he's faking!! Run away!!

Kakashi: -is lying in a pool of blood- Ugh…


	13. Intermission's Sweet Passion

Kakashi: Hey everybody, sorry it took so long once again. So since I've been getting a few questions, in other words complaints about certain things, I'm gonna answer some questions.

Kenshin: Okay SoSickOfNyQuil says: **…this pairing is kinda confusing dude I mean at the beginning Sasuke was dominant and didn't want people to know about him and Naru...now he's all ukeish and open in stuff.**

Kakashi: I get that the most actually. It's not really that it changed, it's just everybody already knows, so he's decided, oh whatever. He's always been ukeish. He just only shows it with Naruto. They're both uke actually…

Sasuke: Alrighty, Itachi's Lover says: **Sakura better not be with Temari.**

Kakashi: First of all that's neither a comment nor a question. That's a threat. Anyway. If it helps the story move in the direction I need it to move I would put Kakashi and Naruto together. (I won't.) If it's a bit off color you'll have to live with it. Demanding how I do things isn't going to get you anywhere. That's all the time we have guys, so send in your questions or comments and I'll try and answer them! On with the story!!

* * *

"Two times two is four, when you double, double, double, oh yeah, you've got to do a double date!"

"Naruto. I love you, and you know it, but you have got to stop singing. Like, forever!"

"Oh shut up! I'm not that bad!"

"You broke a window."

"That was already broken."

"From the last time you sang!" Naruto started to say something then slumped dejectedly.

"It's not my fault I'm tone deaf." He mumbled.

"But it is your fault you insist on singing."

"Okay, Teme, it's over! Next order of business is the double date with Kiba and Shiki, what's the plan Boss Man?" He laughed. "Hey, I'm a poet and I didn't even know it."

"But your feet show it, they're Longfellow's. Enough old jokes, we've got more important things to talk about!"

"You never let me have any fun." He sighed and crossed his arms, pouting.

"You're so damn cute when you pout. Damn it, you're also distracting! So, do we embarrass them in front of everybody, or do we just try and be nice?"

"I'm all for embarrassment." Naruto said, shrugging and blowing his blonde hair out of his face. It was too long and he needed a trim. He put it on his imaginary to-do list below learn to sing properly.

"Me too, but I mean, hey. When we were first going out we didn't want to let anyone know. Common courtesy among ninja, ya know?" Sasuke said, leaning mime style on the wall of his bedroom. His eyes idled over to the picture of the Ninja Academy on the ceiling. He knew what it was like to want to keep relationships a secret, but he also knew Kiba and Shikimaru were assholes.

"Fuck common courtesy and them."

"You would if you could." **(And now for the gay jokes! I love making fun of myself.)**

"Oh shut up Teme, you're no arrow either."

"At least I can keep a straight face in front of people."

"You're not even a homo sapien, you're just a homo." **(And now for the sex jokes! I'm getting all of these out of the way now.)**

"Fuck you."

"I will, I got the lube and angry sex sounds fun."

"Yes it does. But when you're angry you're a real pain in the ass."

"Why don't you put your money where your mouth is?"

"You know I can't reach!" **(Okay, that last bit made no sense, but I've been awake for 38 hours straight and I honestly thought it sounded sensical.)**

"So we're gonna be nice to Kiba and Shiki?"

"I guess. Embarrassing them works better later on."

"Then it's settled." Sasuke nodded and tackled him.

"What the fuck?!"

"Well how come I never get to be the cuddly, funny one?"

"Stop stealing my god damned coffee you…!" He was stifled by a rough, but playful kiss. He moaned and rolled on top of Sasuke, massaging his chest and kissing his collar bone. **(As you might have guessed, the actual double date is NEXT episode.)**

"Have I ever told you just how much I love you, you psychotic fox?"

"I don't remember honestly."

"Well I do. More than anything."

"That's nice."

"Damn straight, err, crooked it is." Naruto laughed and pulled off his shirt, revealing his slightly muscled body, it was kiddy muscle but it still turned Sasuke on. Sasuke grinned and kissed Naruto's nipple lightly. "Meooww Dobe, have you been working out?"

"A bit. Now shush." Naruto winked and nuzzled against him. He was horny, and he wasn't gonna stop till he got his orgasm. Luckily for them neither Sakura nor Kakashi were there. **(I'm always here!!)**

Sasuke rolled out from under him, taking off his shirt, revealing his less defined but strong chest, Naruto blushed, they had both been working out. **(Okay, I'm commenting a lot today, but this scene is kinda embarrassing. Heh...)** Now Sasuke rolled back on top of Naruto and bore down on him, smothering him in kisses. He stopped for a few seconds, feeling Naruto's heart beat back at him, fast and excited.

Sasuke smiled and moved down, unzipping Naruto's pants and pulling them down slowly, laughing a bit as he saw Naruto's erection through his boxers. He pulled down his boxers and stroked his length, feeling it get even harder. He licked the tip and rubbed against the base. Naruto moaned lightly and ran his hands through Sasuke's hair. **(If there's one thing I could change about romance stories the lame ass words for dicks. Sorry if I offended anyone.)**

He moved his head down, opening his mouth wider, his tongue moving up and down along his member. Naruto moaned louder and felt an orgasm almost wash over him, but Sasuke purposely stopped, allowing him to stew. Naruto knew he'd leave him for awhile if he didn't do something. So he did something. He clasped it in his hand and moved it up and down quickly; Sasuke smirked and watched him, blushing a bit. He had seen Naruto naked, and masturbating a hundred times, but he always blushed. Maybe it proved that the flame was still burning as brightly as it had on their first date.

Naruto sighed quietly, wishing Sasuke wasn't such a tease and moved faster. An idea flashed through his head. Revenge is a dish best served with a moan.

"Oh Gaara, that feels so good!" And with surprise he climaxed with ten seconds of that, his mind blanking more than normal, and ecstasy washed through him, he threw his head forward and moaned again. Sasuke glared at him.

"Why do you bring him up?"

"Uhn…Wha…?"

"Why the fuck did you have to bring up that red eyed freak?"

"I don't know 'Sukers, I was just trying to be funny." He smiled innocently upward, and brought his hand up, seductively licked the come off his hand. "You want some? I might have enough energy for another one…" Sasuke shook his head and rolled his eyes. Naruto was such an idiot sometimes.

"Sure babe." He licked the rest off Naruto's hand and snapped. Naruto turned over, his back facing Sasuke. Sasuke gently rested his knees on either side of Naruto's back. He rubbed his back lovingly, and then wriggled out his pants, his erection poking out of the boxers. All for the best, less wriggling was required. He already was coated lightly with pre come and he slipped himself into Naruto, Naruto twitched. He **hated** anal. Unless he was giving it of course. He sighed and lifted himself up a bit, angling his front down and his back up.

Sasuke took advantage and pressed in faster and harder, his hands groping Naruto. He stopped on the in, letting Naruto get reorganized, and continued again, doing it even harder. He moaned loudly and came to a quick orgasm, shaking slightly as he did and fell out of Naruto. Come splattered the bed and Naruto lay back down moaning out of pain and satisfaction. **(Okay, this was more graphic than I thought it would be…)**

"Oh god Dobe, that was fun."

"For you maybe. You were getting your jollies. I said I might have enough energy. Not you take out your anger on my ass…" His head sank lower into his pillow, his pajamas lying on the floor next to him. He wanted to slip into them and go to bed, but he knew Sasuke wouldn't let him yet. He was half right. Sasuke slapped his ass softly and lay down on him, the pressure felt good to Naruto and he giggled.

"You're such a girl."

"Am not. By the way, what happened to my bikini, I thought we could use it later."

"Oh you're not girly at all." Sasuke sighed again and rubbed himself on him.

"Shut up…I'm tired."

"Sure. Alright Dobes, when do we have to wake up for the date?"

"Two hours."

"Sounds good."

"See ya then cutie."

"Okie Dobes…"

* * *

Kakashi: Wow I was horny when I wrote this. It's like, don't write on an empty stomach. I guess for me it's don't write on an erection…Uh, anyway…

Sasuke: You're insane.

Kakashi: I love you too 'Suke.

Kenshin: Oro? This story is about gays? I thought Naruto was a girl and you just referred to them both as he's.

Kakashi: You didn't know that? How do you not know that?

Kenshin: This one did not know.

Sasuke: You've got to get a new host.

Kakashi: Anzu's coming back next time. So we'll see you then!!!


	14. Double Date Horror

Kakashi: Hey everybody, sorry it took so damn long for this. My parents haven't let me on the comp, I've been uninspired. I'm watching and loving Psych, how did I not know about that show?? Anyway, like Write Me No Lies says, I comment a lot in the story, so we're gonna try no comments and stuff through the story. It's like Mystery Science Theatre 3000 for me though, it's hard not to laugh at my own stuff. So yeah, by the way, the clothes picking scene, frankly I have no sense in dress.

Anzu: You're insane.

Kakashi: Isn't that Sakura's line?

Anzu: I thought I'd try it.

Sasuke: It doesn't fit you.

Kakashi: No it doesn't. Meanie. Anyway, on with the story!!!

* * *

"Every breath you take, every step you take, every smile you fake, I'll be watching you…" Sasuke's clock radio blared the Police's most famous stalker song and he woke with a start. "Every move you make, every vow you break, I'll be watching you…"

"Ah shut up Sting, not the time for this shit." He slapped the clock and yelped. The clock was obviously harder than his hand. He sighed and rubbed his eyes, and blinked, looking at the time. "Ah shit! Dobe!! We're laaaatttteee!" He looked to his side, brushing his long black hair out of his eyes. "And of course, he's asleep." Sasuke grabbed Naruto's shoulders and shook him hard.

"Mommy, it's not time to go to bed with the midget foxy thingy…" Sasuke mumbled.

"Wake up!" Sasuke shook him harder. "Well, I can sex my boyfriend into a coma, but I can't wake him up. Not a good sign." Naruto rolled over and then stood up, assuming the Captain Morgan stance. "Oh, even worse, he's a sleep poser." Sasuke growled and tackled Naruto off the bed. "Wake the fuck up!"

Naruto let out a yip and rolled under the bed.

"What happened? Where am I? Sasuke, it's dark and I'm afraid!"

Sasuke rolled his eyes. "You're under the bed, now get out and get dressed; we have a date with the devil. Well, Kiba and Shiki, but still."

"Oh whatever." He rolled out and stood up, and walked over to the dresser, pulling out some boxers and pulling them on. Sasuke watched, staring at his ass.

"Ah Dobes, I've seen you naked so many times and yet I can't get over how cute you are."

"You could do with some work though babe." Naruto said snidely, doing a wiggle at Sasuke. Naruto grinned and pulled on a black t-shirt. On the front was 6 x 942, and on the back was a picture of a book. Sasuke laughed and acted offended.

"At least I don't have love handles."

"More to love 'Suke."

"You got that right cute stuff." Sasuke pulled on his khaki pants and zipped them up. He stretched and pulled on a red shirt and then put on a blue open front sweatshirt. Sasuke looked at himself in the mirror. "This doesn't really match well, does it?"

"It's Kiba and Shiki, do you actually think they'll notice?"

"Not really, but that's okay. I'll wear it anyway." Naruto waved a thumbs up and went back to finding the right jeans. It wasn't as easy as he thought it was, so he closed his eyes and twirled around and pointed at a random pair. They were black and baggy. Even without his eyes he was matching.

"To the ramen house!!"

"It's that Italian place idiot."

"Oh yeah. I knew that…" Naruto rolled his eyes and poked him in the ribs.

"No you didn't you dufus." He hugged him and licked his cheek, slipping his hands into his back pockets.

"Meow babe, but later honey. After the date." Naruto moaned and pushed Sasuke playfully away.

The restaurant was quiet, it was cool, it was empty of Shiki's and Kiba's.

"We've been stood up Dobes. Dobes? Damn it not again." Naruto was resting his head gently against Sasuke's shoulder, snoring softly. Sasuke sighed and ordered another diet coke, leaning back against the booth wall. "Damn Kiba, I knew he'd do this…" He got his drink and sipped, when Shiki slid into the booth seat.

"Kiba ditched, I'm here, who's up for a threesome, and I've got lube and six condoms."

Naruto blinked and woke up, and stared at Shiki. Sasuke stared at him too.

"Uhm…We usually go bareback, but that's still fine. Wait, not the damn point, are you fucking serious? We're not fucking. Seriously." Sasuke flicked his eyes to his right and left comically, and Naruto rubbed his eyes.

"Okay, whatever man, but I've still got all these toys and stuff, and I'm really, really, horny."

"Wow. Shiki, this side of your personality I like." Naruto said, waking up fully. Sasuke turned on him.

"Naruto, he's insane, what are you talking about?!"

"Well maybe if we threw down more I wouldn't care about a horny dude. But nooo, I'm too tired Naruto, I just got secret techniqued by Kakashi, I can't get up. Get some Viagra dude!" Sasuke sighed and rolled his eyes again.

"You're doing it again idiot."

"Sorry…Anyway, we'll take the lube, but you can jack off with the condoms, I hear it's like double the sensation. Uh huh." Shiki stared at him blankly.

"Yeah. Okay, shouldn't have bothered to come."

"Well maybe if you did come once in a while you wouldn't be so damn horny!" Naruto said, and Sasuke put his hand over Naruto's mouth. "Mrhhm, and you mahahemmsm and gbammdk I'll frkming kill vooiu!"

"Sorry about him…I'm not quite sure what's wrong with him today, but he's been going nutty on and off." Sasuke said, elbowing Naruto in the ribs. "We're just gonna go now…" Shiki stared at them and banged his head against the table.

"Stupid Shiki…"

"You…Smell…Like…Sasuke…" A rough and grisly voice came from above him, sand dripping onto Shiki's hand. Shiki stared upward, the rotting face of Gaara stared down at him, sand was dripping from his face and mouth and his eyes were blood red. Gaara sat down next to Shiki and turned his head, more sand dripping from him. Shiki's eyes were transfixed on Gaara's face; he never saw the hand come up from behind him. All of a sudden he felt a tight grip on his pony tail.

"Where…Is he?" Shiki muttered something inaudible. "Where is he?!"

"I don't know, at his house?"

"Thank…You…Good bye…" Gaara grinned, sand pouring out of his mouth and slammed Shiki's face into the table, a loud spurting of blood echoed in the small booth and he ground his face into the table. He stood up and licked the blood off his hands and left the restaurant. Shiki's blood mixed with tears and his vision faded into blackness.

Gaara walked slowly down the street, pulling his feet out of the quicksand his sandals made when he stepped. He grinned again, his teeth bright with blood. He jumped into the air and spun forward, showering the ground and covering the street in a desert of sand. He landed and continued walking, moving faster now. He stopped in front of the Uchihia mansion, staring through the window. He heard the loud cries of Sasuke and Naruto and he growled louder.

Sasuke held Naruto's head lightly as Naruto sucked harder, moving up and down Sasuke's shaft slowly. He stopped and pulled off and rolled into a crouching position.

"Something's…Outside…" Naruto said tensely. Sasuke moaned and pulled his pants back up, he felt it too now. He crouched next to Naruto and they watched the window. All of a sudden the window shattered, sand poured into the room. Gaara's slowly disintegrating body flew through the window, sand flying like sharp needles through the air.

* * *

Kakashi: This was basically a stupid chapter set up to lead into the Gaara finale. So sorry bout that.

Sasuke: S'all good.

Anzu: Yup.

Kakashi: See you next time everyone. Sorry bout this lame episode. Bye cha!


	15. The Gory Good Bye of Gaara

Kakashi: Hello everybody. Got a new story up, check it out. Yes, it's a Kiba/Naru/Sasu, but you'll get over it. Trust me. Anyway…By the way, this is a really intense, semi depressing chapter, but I'm sure you'll still like it. I hope.

Anzu: Hurry up, I wanna find out what happens!

Sakura: Yes!! The parole board has let me out!!!

Kakashi: Oh my god, run Anzu!!!!! Save yourselllffff!

* * *

Needles of sand flew through the air, piercing everything in sight. Sasuke rolled to the side and grabbed hold of the bed as he flew by, the metal crunching under his strong grip. Naruto flew up, quickly focusing his chakra to his feet and hands, attaching himself to the ceiling. The needles stopped and Gaara stood in what was left of his one piece directly below him. Naruto growled in anger and flew downwards, his fist plunging through Gaara's sand barrier and through to his skull, causing him to fall. Naruto stood up and wiped the sweat off his brow.

Gaara shook the blood and sand from his face and body and melded his legs into the sand and stretched forward, flying towards Naruto at top speed. Naruto ducked and grabbed him by the waist, twisting Gaara and sand flew everywhere, blinding Naruto but slowing Gaara down significantly enough for Sasuke to come flying from the side. His feet connected with Gaara's neck and knocked him across the room, crashing through the wall. He hung suspended by his sand legs, inches from the ground.

"No one beats up my fiancée and gets away with Gaara." Sasuke said calmly. Blood streaked red and shiny from his scalp down to his chin, a needle had grazed his forehead. Naruto turned to him to in surprise and happiness. It was quickly stifled as Gaara appeared before them. He grew bigger, the sand at his feet turning him into a blob of bloody sand. Arms grew out of its torso, fists grew from the arms and the fists swung randomly at Sasuke and Naruto. They dodged blow after blow until Sasuke got caught in the stomach and flew into the wall where he collapsed unconscious.

"Sasuke!" screamed Naruto and ran quickly through the haze of sand and blows to his fallen lover. He stared at Sasuke; blood came slowly from his mouth. Tears welled in Naruto's eyes, and then the demonic fox filled his eyes. His whisker marks thickened into deep black marks, his nails sharpening and his wounds healing. He screamed again and flung himself at Gaara, reigning blows back onto him. Blood and sand flew everywhere, but none was Naruto's. He cried out as the sight of Sasuke flooded back into his mind, refreshing his power and drive, blowing Gaara back.

Behind Naruto Sasuke stirred. He coughed and blood spurted into his hand. His vision was bleary, he was still half out of it. He couldn't see what was happening but he could have sworn he saw Naruto Uzumaki, fox demon incarnate, dorky kid, prankster, his lover, his fiancée, pounding away at Gaara. Sasuke coughed again. No, it must have been an illusion. Sakura, or Shiki must have been there. His eyes focused clearer and then became watery. It was Naruto! Naruto was fighting to save him, as he had done on the tree through the wall incident. He only wished he had the energy to get up again and fight. He sank lower, but with all the energy he could muster he cried out, "I believe in you Naruto, and I love you!"

Naruto heard his lover's yell from behind him and turned, seeing Sasuke was okay gave him new hope and more energy than before. He turned back to Gaara and where his eye was he could have sworn were tears also. And that was when he lost his Fox Demon form. It was the understanding that they were both fighting for the same thing, Sasuke. Gaara had hurt Sasuke; he knew it, or at least a part of him, deep inside. The creature couldn't harm anyone anymore. He heard a muffled gasp for air and from the middle of the beast Gaara fell out, still attached to the thing by the arms and legs.

Gaara was bleeding heavily, tears pouring over his face, turning his chin and cheek to a muddy resemblance of a human face. And Naruto recognized the eyes of Gaara. They weren't monsters eyes, they were Naruto's eyes. The eyes he had seen so many times in the mirror before Sasuke came into his life. The eyes of a lonely soul, eyes that had seen to much and had been given a similar fate. Scorned by most, loved by few, but always would those eyes and the face and body of that person be alone. Gaara fell from the monster, the sand sinking through the holes in the walls and floors. It was now just Naruto and Gaara, alone on the battlefield of love and jealousy.

It should have been hate Naruto felt for the half human wreck that lay at his feet. But instead it was pity. Naruto knew just how bad it was to be hated. He kneeled in front of Gaara and looked at him. Gaara lifted his head; sandy chunks were missing, like a pot being smashed in certain places. Naruto looked at the tired face of just a tired teenage boy and cried for the second time that night. He extended his hand and Gaara took it, and with the last of his fading fox strength pulled Gaara too his feet and wrapped an arm around him to hold him steady.

Sasuke was still watching from the wall. He saw the monster end and he saw Naruto's kind gesture. It had reminded him of all his feelings for Naruto and he quickly pushed himself to his feet, blood leaking from his mouth again. He staggered over to the two huddled warriors. Sasuke fell to his knees and saw the others do the same. Sasuke grabbed Naruto's hand and squeezed it tightly. He whispered over and over again, I love you Naruto, I love you, I love you. Gaara had now lost even the eyes of the gay adolescent who had talked to them on the beach oh so long ago. They were the eyes that had given in, that had resigned from giving life and character to a person.

"I…I have…To turn myself…In…I've done…Terrible, terrible things…I must be punished, or at least stopped…Before I can do anymore damage…" Gaara stuttered painfully and stood. He swaggered the swagger of a drunk or a beaten man. Neither Naruto nor Sasuke stopped him from leaving as he vanished from their lives forever. Gaara trotted painfully down the stairs, blood and sand foot prints left on every step. Gaara was bare foot but he didn't mind. Nothing mattered to him but getting to Temari and then going to the police.

Meanwhile back at Sasuke's mansion Naruto was dialing for help. Sasuke was lying on the couch. He had removed his shirt and they had found the damage to be internal. The punch had crushed him in more ways then one. Naruto morbidly told the operator what had occurred, and within minutes he heard the sirens of the Ninja Ambulance arriving. Sasuke was quietly carted into the small machine. Naruto sat next to one of the paramedics in silence and held his head in his hands. It was going to be a very long time before he would forget this.

* * *

Kakashi: Yay! Not the end, but we're getting close. I'm already plotting out the next chapters. Sorry it's so morbid, I just wanted to give Gaara dramatic exit. It was probably my favorite chapter actually. But hey, I'm weird.

Sakura: That was odd.

Anzu: Very…

Kakashi: What the hell? How was it odd?

Anzu: Just was.

Sakura: Yep…

Kakashi: What were the terms to your parole by the way?

Sakura: Uhm….

The Police: There's an escaped convict around, have you seen her?

Kakashi & Anzu: She went that way!!!!

The Police: Thanks. By the way, Every breathe you take is our favorite song too.

Kakashi: Cooool. Alrighty. Well, we'll see you next time. Read my other story. It's a bit OC apparently. Bye!


	16. Boredom Strikes: The Wedding Worrier

Kakashi: Hey. Uhm, I'm going to my sisters and then my brothers until pretty much a week from the start of school, so I may not have another chance to write a chapter for a while. So, enjoy this one.

Sasuke: You are such a bad updater dude. Don't go into the manga business, the deadlines will kill you.

Kakashi: I know!! Anyway, by the way guys, I'd really like to know at what chapter count you think is better, 20 or 25? I can do either and then some more chapters if I get enough feedback. I can feel the end approaching but I really love this story and I'm not sure which story line I'm gonna use, so please tell me what you think, 20 or 25, or even more?

Anzu: On with the story!

Kakashi: That's my line!

Anzu: Well now it's mine.

Kakashi: No it's not! On with the story!

* * *

Déjà vu. The experiences of feeling like you've done whatever you're doing before this. In Naruto's case it was more like a parallel dimension experience. Sasuke lying on the hospital bed griping that he's fine, nurses walking in on them in compromising situations, various aggravations from the local chapter of the Sasuke Fan Club. Much to Sasuke's chagrin there was such a thing, and it was very embarrassing. 

Meanwhile back at the wreckage of the Uchiha manor various building crews were fixing it up. Needless to say the damage was considerable. Naruto had taken to living back in his hovel of a house, amazed it was still his, he had been living with Sasuke.

The walls had degraded quite a bit, and light shafted through the holes in the walls during the morning and woke Naruto. This however wasn't why he wasn't sleeping well. He would go to bed early having nothing better to do, in all senses of the word, and would wake up ten hours later feeling like he had just fought war. This could be because he tossed and turned all night with nightmares, it could also be because the springs in his mattress were broken and he felt like he was sleeping on a bed of nails. Was it because he still couldn't forget the fight, Sasuke asked once during one of Naruto's bedside trips.

He had agreed it might have been that, but he hadn't really thought so. No, what he thought was he couldn't sleep because since the fight, the wedding had been put on hold and basically forgotten. Naruto had been looking forward to it. He had been dreaming of it fondly ever since he had asked Sasuke to marry him. There hadn't been a day they didn't talk about it, and now all of a sudden Sasuke wasn't even wearing the ring Naruto had gotten him. Naruto had moved back into Sasuke's place, it had been two weeks of hard work, but the construction company had gotten it fixed and better than before.

Naruto stared around the empty kitchen and then picked up the phone, desperate for company having nothing to do as of the moment. He fished around in his memory for the number and then dialed up Sakura.

"Hello?"

"Hey Sakura, its Naruto."

"Oh hey Naruto, what's up?"

"The usual nothing. I'm seriously just bored out of my mind, can you come over? I'll make tea or coffee, or soda or something, anything?" He knew he sounded desperate but what did it matter? He was desperate.

"Uh…Sure, I'll be over in about 10 minutes, and I'll take Diet Coke if you have it."

"Would you like fries with that order m'am?"

"Oh shut up Naruto. I'll be there soon."

"Alright, alright, bye." Naruto grinned and hung up, rolling his eyes. He walked over to the refrigerator and grabbed two cokes and then sat down, and then stood up again. He did this twice more and sighed. "This is going to be a long day…"

He had repeated the sitting and then standing up 10 more times by the time Sakura arrived. He jumped as the doorbell rand and almost tripped getting to the door.

"The house looks great Naruto!" Sakura exclaimed as she walked through the door. "You can hardly tell someone blew it up."

"Yeah they did a good job." Naruto said, marveling a bit himself. It _was _a good job.

"So what's up?" Sakura said, sitting down.

"I dunno, it's just really boring around here without Sasuke to occupy my time. I mean, with Master Kakashi out of commission lately we haven't had anything to do…"

"Okay, what's really up?"

"What do you mean?"

"Well, that can't be it, you're always bursting with energy, no way in hell are you bored."

"I know….It's just…Ever since the incident I feel like the whole…Wedding thing is off. Like, all of a sudden we aren't going to. I'm just afraid that now that this has happened, everything will start to fall apart. I don't want it to fall apart Sakura."

"Is that all?"

"Yeah that's all, what do you mean?"

"Well of course he's not going to talk about getting married right after that. That was so stressful and awful for you, that he thinks by stressing you out more with wedding details will push you over the brink. Sasuke loves you, he's trying to be nice you idiot."

"No, Sasuke isn't that deep. Though he can go surprisingly far…"

"Oh my god Naruto, TMI!" Sakura said horrified at the thought.

"TMI?" Naruto said a blank look of not understanding on his innocent face.

"Too much info. I didn't need to know that Naruto. Seriously!"

"Oh, sorry…So do you really think he's trying to protect me?"

"Yes. I really do."

"Thanks Sakura."

"Just doing my job."

"What job?"

"It's a figure of speech."

"I knew that."

Sakura poked him on the nose and sighed. "Naruto. Just, don't bring anything up until he's out of the hospital. He has enough to worry about."

"I know. He gets out next week by the way, should we have a party?"

"Ooh, I actually like the idea of a melodramatic, You Got Better, party. That sound's fun."

"Okay, see that's verging on sarcastic."

"No, I'm serious, we should totally do that." Sakura laughed in a fake maniacal laugh. Naruto stared at her for a second then shook his head.

"Alright. You figure that out. I have to go visit Sasuke and stuff."

"Fine, but no telling him your idea, it's going to be a surprise party."

"No, a surprise party is when I tackle him on the stairs with a video camera. Well, actually that's the first part of the surprise. The second is when I put the video on the net."

"TMI again Naruto! Though, out of curiosity, what's the name of it?

"Naru-Naru's-sexlife.kom, why?"

"No reason." She said, shifting her gaze.

"Ohhh, you wanna watch. Good luck, you need a password."

"Damn password protected porn! Why can't I ever get you free?!"

"Uhm…Wow, this is a new side of you Sakura." Naruto said, staring at her. She blinked and looked at him.

"You didn't hear or see that." She muttered and opened the door. "Just remember, don't tell him about the party or I'll kill you!"

"No problem. See ya tomorrow."

"Kay, bye." She said, still hesitantly and walked out. The instant the door closed Naruto burst out laughing.

"Oh god that girl is a big cup o' crazy." He laughed again and climbed up the stairs to get dressed.

"She said that? Really?"

"Oh yeah. She's full time extra strength psycho. Course, I shouldn't have told her the site name, but she'll never get in anyway."

"Good…"

"So…Sasuke…I've been thinking a lot lately…And I know we haven't…Ya know, been talking about it, but uh. We're engaged and stuff…"

"I know we are Naruto. It's kind of hard to forget…I just don't want to think about it right now. We're going through some tough times right now, and maybe we should slow down on the engagement, extend the date a month longer or so."

"Oh…I guess that makes sense…" Naruto sighed and looked down at his hands. "It's just…I've been missing you so badly…" He felt Sasuke's soft hand on his head and sighed again.

"And I miss you Dobe…I dunno, it just feels wrong to be all happy so soon after this whole messiness. Maybe I'm being an idiot." He ruffled Naruto's hair and moved down the bed, making it easier for him to reach Naruto's face. He leaned in against him, brushing his lips against his forehead. "I love you Naruto, and you know that…Just, let me be an idiot for a little bit longer. I'm getting out next week, and we can pretend we're on our honeymoon all night long, okay sweetie?"

"I guess." Naruto grinned and kissed Sasuke back. "I'll wait for you. And I'd follow you to the ends of the earth Sasuke." Sasuke blinked and then blushed lightly. He sighed contently and leaned back in his bed, holding Naruto's hand softly.

"It's been a while since we did this."

"Hospital loving? We did this just the other day."

"No, just the being together, holding each other's hands and talking…" Sasuke said quietly. "It's really nice."

"I guess it has been a while huh?" Naruto admitted, blushing. "When did you get all soft-core on me?" Sasuke laughed and squeezed his hand.

"I've always loved cuddling you dork. But you always fall asleep right after."

"Yeah…It's because I always used to jack off right before going to sleep, it'd like, tire me out enough so I could just pass out."

"That would explain a lot."

"Did you ever?"

"Did I ever what?"

"Jack off." Naruto said with a smile playing at the edges of his lips.

"Before you?"

"Yeah, before me."

"Every night." Sasuke laughed again and stopped, the pain in his ribs choking the mirth from him. "I did it like, eight times before our first date, I was so nervous. I did it to calm down, but every time right after I'd get nervous again. Finally I managed to put on my cool act."

"Wow. I never knew that."

"I guess it's because we don't ever talk about the past."

"Maybe…All of a sudden it seems like our relationship was all about sex."

"Aw Dobe. It was only about sex in the beginning. We talk all the time. You're getting jittery because you had too much coffee again."

"That's soooo true. Think that nurse can get me more?" This time they both laughed, but it was a cautious laugh. Something had changed; it was something very small and very subtle, but something had changed.

* * *

Kakashi: Yay! Longest chapter of First Date! Hope you all liked it cause that's all your getting for about 1-2 weeks. I really hope I can get back on soon. 

Anzu: I do too….Is it a change for the good?

Kakashi: You'll have to wait and see.

Anzu: I don't wanna wait!

Sasuke: Neither do I!

Kakashi: Too bad! Please review, tell me what you think.

Anzu: Or else!

Sasuke: That's a bit harsh, don't you think?

Kakashi: Ah who cares.

Anzu: Obviously Sasuke does.

Kakashi: Grrr…Whatever you guys, just work it out and be quiet. Anyway… See ya next time everybody!


	17. Bonus Chapter!

Kakashi: Yay, this is a special chapter for my 100th review!! Sorry I was gone so long, but thanks a bunch guys! So for this chapter I'm just gonna thank people, and do random bonuses for the people who care. Oh, and maybe a sneak preview.

Sasuke: Plus you want to keep them in suspense, right?

Kakashi: Actually it's more of a stall tactic. But good guess 'Suke. So yeah, if you're interested, here's some of my looking back thoughts….

* * *

Chapter 1: Yeah, this was totally meant to be a one shot, and I was using it to relieve stress and just do something light hearted. I'm a sucker for romance anyway. It was fun writing it, though as I look back it was really childish. If I have time I might go back and fix some stuff, maybe rewrite parts of it. I got a lot of people saying the sex was too short, and that kinda disheartened me, but otherwise people kept telling me to continue it, soooo.

Chapter 2: This chapter was completely unplanned, and it shows in the way it was written. I'd actually intended to end the story with this chapter, but again, reviews came and told me otherwise. This entire story was actually a lot like an unplanned baby, annoying, scary, and un-thought out. I didn't know how to improve on what was already happening, and it just kept surprising me. And the ending sucked, I realized I needed to make the ending weird and put someone in the hospital, and I did it, but the end sentences I hated.

Chapter 3: AHS, I remember you well. This was actually a spur of the moment thing, and it was kinda my feeling at the moment, one of my really good friends told me about having sex with someone in the hospital and I was kinda jealous, so I did it myself in story form. **Lucky nurse. **That was my favorite response to this chapter. It's so true, that was a damn lucky nurse. Oh, this was the beginning of the end for Ino! Hah. Yeah, I wanted to make Naruto have a straight accident, and that was Ino. Unfortunately I was in a bad mood when I wrote this and Ino ended up just being a stupid bitch who got turned down quickly. Oh, and at this point in the story I gave up my other stories, Yugi-Oh and Rurouni Kenshin. Just deleted them. I almost regret that.

Chapter 4: Ugh, this chapter SUCKED. It was depressing and sad, the characters were stupid, nothing interesting happened, it was a childish desire to kill of people so I didn't have to use them anymore. I'm not even going to dignify this chapter with my comments.

Chapter 5: Ah Kakashi, you idiot. Yeah, Kakashi is a pedophile in this episode, but I still love him. The whole plot was really silly and it was really fun to write. I know it was dumb and that it didn't make much sense, but that was the chapter. Lot's of sexual jokes, and disturbing descriptive words.

After a break of about a year…..

Chapter 6: My friend told me about their story on Fanfiction and I remembered I had one on there too! Haha! Silly me. And suddenly the words, **The sound of lukewarm water splashing tile and naked skin filtered through the door to Sasuke's ears**. I suddenly knew what had to be done. So I grabbed a diet coke and I sat down and I read my story over again, because I truly didn't remember it. And then I wrote the 6th chapter and the portal into the Sakura Obsessing Badly Arc.

Chapter 7: And the end of the SOB arc. I had again, intended to end it here, because I have trouble with ending stories, but I liked my next idea for a chapter. Not much to say with this chapter, just kind of blah chappy.

Chapter 8: The proposal. Naruto had gotten a bikini while shopping with Sakura, and I thought it'd be hilarious for them to go to the beach in drag. Turns out that isn't much fun to write, soooo, I said the hell with it and I gave Naruto a wedding ring. I intended to marry them off eventually but I thought, why not now?? Why did Naruto propose to Sasuke instead of vice versa? 3 reasons, Naruto has no shame, the changing room conversation would only have worked with Naruto there, and finally, Sasuke needed to talk to Gaara while Naruto was away. Life was too peachy for these guys, so I brought in red eyes and got him to fall in love with 'Suke.

Chapter 9: This probably moved too fast, but oh well. Actually, Sasuke brings it up that he's only known him for a day. Gaara is now infatuated with Sasuke, and tries to rape him pretending to be Naruto. Did he take lessons from Ino? They both did equally badly. Anyway…A silly chapter so I could introduce Temari and show a bit of Gaara's past.

Chapter 10: I actually planned out this and next two chapters in my head and on paper, so there wasn't much mystery to the writing of this. I wanted Gaara to get in trouble, muck around in some relationships, all that good stuff. I like this chapter, and it worked well, at least in my mind, thought there are consistency and logical errors.

Chapter 11: Ah hangovers. Again, this was planned out and there really wasn't anything surprising or interesting. Naruto and Sasuke made up, Gaara got away, I got to tease the readers. All sorts of fun stuff.

Chapter 12: This chapter went by quickly and I got to do lots of my funny back and forth dialogue. This was a segway into a segway. I needed Gaara to make a creepy return, why not have him party crash again? So Kiba and Shiki and Naruto and Sasuke agree to go out on a date. Sounded like fun at the time.

Chapter 13: Sex and innuendo galore, lots of reviews, horny teens and all of it was unintentional. I wanted the date to start here but realized Naruto and Sasuke hadn't fucked lately, and this might be their last chance for the while. Soooo, y'all got sex.

Chapter 14: This was like a replay of chapter 4. Stupid dialogue, stupid characters, lame date. I was lethargic and bored, I thought I'd just go through the motions of writing an interesting story and be done with it. Thus, this chapter was born.

Chapter 15: My favorite chapter ever!! I sat up all night once, just thinking this fight out in my mind. I can still play it back in my head. I had it completely written in my head, down to the smallest word and comma. It was fun to write and I hope you all liked it too.

Chapter 16: Haha, the latest chapter. I wanted to make Naruto feel bad about Gaara, but then I realized, oh shit. This is like the Ino Arc all over again!! Noooooooo, I'm trapped again! And then I remembered something that made me shiver all over, these idiots are still engaged! Ha! So I made Naruto worry about the wedding. Which leads into the newest story line. The Wedding Planner and the Nervous Bride Arc. Hope you guys love it.

Chapter 17: I had been wanting to do a special chapter like this for a while, but the time seemed right because I had broken the 100 review fan base. I love and I read all of your reviews! Thank you for them.

Chapter 18: Coming soon to a site near you soon. The ominous change in temperament, blood on the banister, tears shed, more blood on the banister, and Naruto shops for a wedding dress?!?!

Thanks to everyone who reviewed!!! Thanks to everyone who favorited and alerted!!!

9TailedNaruto94

Aerovaldi

Alexlover13

Anime-girl-cutie

AsukaSyusuka

DarkMistress67

Dreamer of the Shadowed Moon

Foxy-chan09

Gothic-InuFluffy

Heaven's Valentine

. Mask Of Smiles

MeatwaD9021

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* * *

Kakashi: So anyway, that's your bonus chapter, see you next time for the next episode of….First Date!

Sasuke: See ya!

Sakura: Bye!

Anzu: Sayonara and good luck!

Kenshin: Oro? Good bye?

Naruto: Bye-cha! I love Sasuke!!!


	18. Boredom Strikes 2: Wedding Dress

Kakashi: Wow I'm such a fuck head. School started and bam, I'm off the comp. I'm taking a few minutes to do this Chapter and then it's back to the books.

Sakura: That sucks.

Kakashi: It does.

Anzu: On with the story you whiner!

Kakashi: My girls don't love me anymore. It's enough to make me cry.

* * *

"Oh we're off to see the Wizard, the wonderful Wizard of Oz!" sung Naruto Uzumaki off key as he hopped down the stairs of his soon to be husband's house. He flipped his long blonde hair out of his eyes; he desperately needed a hair cut. He pounced into the kitchen still singing and rolled over to Sasuke Uchihia in a hyper ball.

"Let me guess, you're going to ask him for brains, or better yet a bigger…" Sasuke grinned and poked his nose.

"So not cool dude! You weren't complaining last night when I rocked your world. Know what I mean?"

"No, not really." Sasuke winked and kissed him softly. "Just kidding honey you rocked my world so hard I thought I was at a Slayer concert."

"Damn right." Naruto smiled and stood up stretching. Living with Sasuke was better than ever now, yes, Sasuke was still randomly squirting blood, (damn you Gaara, thought Naruto) but there relationship had changed. It was better; it was more fun, more relaxed. The first week had been awkward but it had gotten better, and now it was back to normal and then some.

Sasuke smiled and got a soda out of the refrigerator and took a long sip from it idly.

"So what're your plans for the day?"

"Wedding stuff. Gotta get an outfit. You?"

"I'm on bed rest still silly, now go get your shopping done so we can do naughty things tonight."

"Cool. Alright 'Suke, I'll see you tonight."

"I love you Dobe."

"Love you too 'Suke."

Naruto walked out still dancing, sipping on the diet coke, which Sasuke was just now realizing was gone from his hand. Sasuke sighed and began walking up the stairs, a new soda in his grip and then grimaced, spitting blood onto the rail and stairs and collapsed to his knees, coughing.

"Fuck…How long is it going to take to heal…?" He gripped his stomach and walked up the stairs, wiping his hands on the hankie he had taken to carrying in his pocket.

Naruto ran all the way downtown, stopping only to pick up Sakura, who angrily pedaled after him on her bike, but still trailed after him.

"Slow down you jack ass!"

"I win!!" Naruto said sliding into the bridal shop, his sandals sending up gouts of sand and dust.

"You lose idiot, that's a boutique, you need to rent a tux. What the hell does Sasuke see in you?" Sakura said angrily, brushing her pink hair off of her forehead. **(Inner Sakura) Probably his penis. **Sakura blushed and looked at her feet.

"I'm gonna buy a dress, I think it's more fitting, don't you?"

"Be gayer Naruto."

"Hard to do."

"You're not seriously going to get married in a dress are you?"

"I'm getting married to a guy; I think a dress is fitting. If you marry Temari you'll wear the tuxedo right?" Sakura blushed furiously and hit him on the head angrily.

"Shut up you idiot."

"See, you're obviously the one who wears the pants."

"Shut up I said." She folded her arms and looked away.

"Right. Anyway, I'm getting married in a dress, if you have a problem you don't need to be my maid of honor."

"Aww." Sakura's anger melted away and she hugged him. "Can I really be maid of honor?"

"Duh!" Naruto hugged her back and then looked around. "Where the hell is a, oh hello, yeah, we're looking for a wedding dress." Naruto said smiling to the sharp faced red haired woman who had up until then been hiding behind the register.

"Well we have many dresses that I think the young miss would look very pretty in." Sakura's eye twitched and she shoved Naruto out of the way.

"It's not me; it's this guy who wants the dress."

"Surely you're kidding."

"I hate to quote Airplane, but no, and don't call me Shirley."

"You really want a dress for him?"

"Yes I want the damn dress, what's so hard to believe about this?" Naruto interjected.

"Wait, wait, wait, are you Mr. Uzumaki?"

"Yes I am." The woman laughed cheerily and patted his head.

"Of course you are! Such a cute little gay boy."

"What the fuck?" Naruto and Sakura said at the same time.

"We've been expecting you. The only gay couple in the entire village, how could we NOT be expecting you?"

"See Sakura, I told you it was the right thing to do." Naruto growled at Sakura.

"Right this way Mr. Uzumaki."

Meanwhile back at home Sasuke was collapsed on the bed, breathing slowly and softly. He twisted under the covers and pulled his reddening pillows to him and he blinked awake. He yawned and squeezed the pillow, then jerked back throwing the pillow from him and falling off the bed backwards, coughing more blood.

"Damn it!!" He sighed and wiped his mouth. "It's getting worse…" He went into the bathroom and cleaned off his face. He looked at himself in the mirror, his eyes had dark circles around them and he rubbed them away. He stepped into the shower and lay down into the tub and sighed. There was still some water in it and he stripped, leaving the clothes hanging off the side.

"What am I going to do? The hospital just said it was residual, but there's got to be more to it." He sighed again and rubbed his dick softly, remembering Naruto's soft touch. He clicked a near invisible button near the back of the tub and a secret compartment opened. He was a ninja after all. He pulled out the 7 inch plastic dildo that he'd taken from a print of Naruto's dick and smiled. "Naruto may not be here but he's here in other ways." He said to no one in particular and the grin widened. He licked the dildo and ran it along his lips gently and sucked on the tip, massaging himself still. He continued sucking it and massaging, and suddenly he orgasmed. He shuddered briefly and his eyes widened, the shock was too much and he coughed loudly, blood splattering against the wall and his body, tears running from his eyes.

Naruto and Sakura had successfully found a dress and returned to Sasuke's house, loud and exuberant, having stopped at the ramen house for a beer and some noodles. Naruto charged in, and twirled on the spot.

"I feel pretty, oh so pretty, and witty, and giddy, and gayyy!" He sang loudly and ran up the stairs, Sakura at his feet. He slowed to a walk as he heard moaning, and he turned, and saw the scene in the bathroom. His eye's filled with tears and he rushed in, Sakura stood motionless at the door, and then ran downstairs again to call the hospital. Sasuke grinned at Naruto as he came in.

"I promised you…Naughty things…I guess I took it…Too far huh?"

"No you idiot, no…Sasuke, oh god Sasuke, don't talk that way, please hold on for me, okay?" Sasuke kissed him on the cheek leaving a bright red bloody kiss on Naruto and Naruto sunk back onto his knees, crying. "You're going to be okay…"

* * *

Kakashi: Yes, short, depressing, and not at all what I wanted it to be, but oh well I guess. It'll get better. I hope. I think. Yeah.

Anzu: It better!

Sakura: Yeah it better!

Kakashi: Yeah I know…..See you guys next time for another exciting episode of First Date!!!


	19. Boredom Strikes 3: Hospital Woes

Kakashi: I've noticed I use a lot of pop culture references and I'm not entirely sure everyone gets them. Oh well.

Anzu: They aren't stupid.

Kakashi: That's true. Thanks for reading this story by the way!

Sakura: Dude, stop sucking up.

Kakashi: But…I'm watching [Scrubs…I can't concentrate.

* * *

"See here, there's a slight rupture in the appendix, and he has a laceration on his stomach, both easy enough to fix, we're confident he can make it if we operate **now.**" Doctor Kishimoto said in a low pitched voice. He seemed confident and Naruto nodded.

"By the way, how the hell did you not catch this when he was here 3 weeks ago?"

"It was a small cut and they both widened over the course of time." The doctor patted Naruto's head gently and smiled. "Don't worry son, this is not life threatening at this time. We just need your signature here, and here, and we'll get to the saving of your boyfriend's life, okay?" Naruto nodded again and signed his name on the waiver and handed it back.

"Please do your best."

"Don't worry; he's going to be just fine."

"Can I watch the surgery?"

"I suppose. It depends on the attending surgeon."

"Thank you Dr. Kishimoto." Naruto bowed and walked out, grabbing Sakura's hand and squeezing it tightly, tears welling up in his eyes. "He's going to be okay, he's going into surgery soon."

"That's a good thing right?" Sakura pulled him onto the couch in the waiting room.

"Yeah, it's an easy surgery apparently. I'm going to go watch." Naruto sighed and rubbed his eyes.

"That's good…" She embraced him gently and released him. "I'll be here, tell me how it goes."

"Yes M'am." Naruto hugged her again and walked away towards the O.R.

"He's going to be okay. He's going to be okay…" Sakura repeated to herself over and over again, pacing back and forth.

**Caution: Semi Graphic Content Ahead**

Naruto approached the attending surgeon cautiously and tapped him on the shoulder.

"Sir, uhm…I'm a friend of the boy who's going into surgery next…And err, I was wondering if I could watch the surgery, to make sure he's okay."

"Oh kid, I don't know, that's not usually done." Naruto affixed him with a cute sad puppy face and let his chin waver. "Ah what the hell. Alright, you can watch but you have to be in the observation desk. If anyone asks, tell them Dr. Turk gave you permission."

"Thank you so much Dr. Turk."

"Yeah, yeah, just go before I change my mind." Naruto bowed again and hurried up to the observation deck, 10 minutes later the surgery got under way.

"Scalpel and clamp please." The surgical nurse handed Dr. Turk the scalpel and a small clamp. He made a small incision in the stomach area and blood flowed slowly from the cut, and then placed the clamp. He opened and took a needle and took a gradually disintegrating wire and threaded his needle.

Dr. Turk stitched his stomach, starting at the top right side and moving down to the opposite side of the stomach. At the second to last stitch the stomach opened slightly, and stomach acid dripped out.

"Shit, give me the cloth." He grabbed the cloth and wiped away the juice, then continued sewing the stomach up. "There we go, perfect." He stitched the cut and made another incision vertically over his appendix and cut the organ at the top, and blood squirted slowly from the cut. He placed a disintegrating sealant onto the hole and sealed the wound.

"Congrats team. Another successful surgery. This was not a solo effort, so as I say, oh fuck." Sasuke had started twitching and then thumped up and down; the machine gave a mechanical beep. "He's flat lining, it's got to be a bad reaction to the anesthetic, starting CPR." Naruto's eyes widened and he slapped the glass.

**End of Semi Graphic Part**

"What the fuck!!" He rushed down and skidded into the room and proceeded to run into a large orderly.

"This is a sterile room; you'll have to wait outside!"

"Please no, he's my boy friend, don't, stop, let me go!" Naruto cried out but the orderly shoved him out. Sasuke continued thumping up and down and then stopped.

"Clear!" The doctor zapped him and counted to three. "Clear!" He zapped him again and the machine started beeping again. "Phew. Shit, that was close…"

**Later**

Naruto slammed his way into Sasuke's room and fell to his knees and kissed Sasuke over and over again.

"Oh god Sasuke I'm so happy you're alive, oh my little Sasuke, oh Sasuke…" he kissed him again and shook him gently.

"Naruto…?"

"Yes Sasuke I'm here. You're all better sweetie."

"I was sick?" Sasuke grinned and kissed him, his face was pale and he sighed gently.

"Oh shut up."

"I love you my Dobe." Sasuke lay back onto the bed and gripped Naruto's hand tightly. "They say the anesthesia puts you to sleep without dreams, but the whole time I saw your face…" Naruto didn't want to tell him it was because he was there, so he just smiled and sat next to him in the visitor's chair.

"So they tell me you'll be out in about five days, and you'll be on bed rest again. Jesus Temi that's a lot of sleep you'll get."

"Oh god, like I need it. Pshaw. Can we still have relations of the intimate nature?"

"Probably." Naruto rubbed his stomach gently. "I'm sorry sweetie."

"It's not your fault Dobes." Naruto kissed him again for that and tousled his hair.

Sakura paced the room anxiously and chewed her finger nails.

"What the hell is taking so long??" Sakura walked up to the Nurse's station and asked if Sasuke was out of surgery, to which the nurse replied yes. "Thanks."

**(Inner Sakura) That little fuck said he'd tell me the instant he was out. Damn you Naruto you dumb ass. **

Sakura burst through the door like Naruto, but instead of crying she yelled.

"You idiots! Naruto you promised you'd tell me how it went and you ditch me, and Sasuke! Getting bloody all over every where and you're not even listening to me, are you?!" It was true, Sasuke was still staring at Naruto and Naruto was still staring at Sasuke. "I can't believe you two!!"

"I'm sorry Sakura, I know you were worrying about him." Naruto said calmly, and kissed Sasuke again. "But you need to relax."

Sakura sighed and sank into the extra chair and rubbed her eyes.

"You two are still idiots. But I'm glad you're okay."

"Yeah…" Naruto whispered and lay his head down on Sasuke's chest and sighed. "Sakura? Could you come back in a little bit?" Naruto winked at her and she rolled her eyes.

"Sure…I guess I'll see you later." Sakura rolled her eyes again and walked out, but stopped and stared between the blinds to watch.

Naruto stood up and pulled the sheets off of Sasuke, and massaged his hips and stomach.

"You're so wonderful Doberoo." He moaned as Naruto kissed and licked his member. Sasuke stroked Naruto's head gently as he sucked on his tip. Sakura blushed furiously and covered her eyes with her hand, then peeked between her fingers as Naruto worked his head down Sasuke's shaft. "God bed rest rocks…" Sasuke moaned and pet Naruto's hair more.

Naruto now had Sasuke's member all the way in his mouth and stroked the very bottom of the shaft gently and felt it shudder as pre come went down his throat. Sasuke moaned in pleasure pain, the surgery hurt a little, but the BJ was doing wonders for the pain. He shuddered again and came, whispering Naruto's name and Naruto sucked quietly for another minute and then released his mouth's death grip and fell back into the chair.

"I so needed that…"

"And so did I." Naruto said blushing and wiped his mouth off. "More than you know…"

Sasuke stared at him oddly for a second and the moment passed.

"Maybe so. I love you Dobe."

"I love you too Sasuke."

* * *

Kakashi: Had to throw in the sex at the end, I was floundering for an end and I thought, it just wouldn't be First Date without some sex, ya know?

Sakura: I'm not a peeping tom by the way.

Anzu: Yes you are, you were totally horny for them.

Kakashi: That's disturbing.

Anzu: Very.

Sakura: Stop it guys!!!

Anzu: Hahahahaha.

Kakashi: Anyway, that's it for now; I'll try and get another chapter up soon. Love you all! And I'll see you next time for the next installment of First Date!


	20. Boredom Strikes 4: Perfect Couple

Kakashi: Aghhh. School freaking sucks! I hate it!

Anzu: Everyone does though Kakashi.

Kakashi: But I can't write when I'm in school.

Anzu: True…

Sakura: Soooo. Sasuke is all better right?

Kakashi: I don't think it'll ruin anything to say yes, the gore of the last two chapters is over.

Sakura: Yay!!!

Men in White Coats: Haruno Sakura, you're under arrest!

Sakura: Oh shit!!

Kakashi: What'd she do this time?

* * *

"I can't get to sleep, I think about the implications, of getting in toooo deep." Naruto hummed blissfully as he traced his name along Sasuke's smooth chest.

"That's what I was saying last night." Sasuke mumbled, rubbing Naruto's back.

"Oh, 'Suke that is just…Dude, it's a song, don't ruin it with your innuendo." Naruto grinned. "Besides, you can't get that far with your thingy."

"That's harsh cutie."

Naruto giggled and blushed, resting his head on Sasuke's chest.

"So you really want to get married?" Sasuke said, stroking Naruto's hair.

"Of course honey, I love you." Naruto whispered, kissing his chest. Sasuke smiled and then frowned, sinking further into the pillow.

"Aww." Sasuke cooed absentmindedly. "I'm going back to sleep Dobe. See you when I wake up."

"Kay, I'm going to go get coffee and do some shopping. See you around six." Naruto kissed his cheek and stood up, picking out a black tank top with pink lettering saying Spoiled Princess, and a pair of black swim trunks with a line of pockets around the top. He waved to an already dozing Sasuke and climbed down the stairs whistling a Phil Collin's song.

Sasuke twitched in his sleep. His dream was funny at first, but it had turned into a nightmare. Sasuke had been dancing with Naruto; Naruto was wearing a wedding dress and Sasuke a black tux. They were spinning slowly, Konoha cheering them and accepting Naruto, their life style, and wishing them happiness. Then a pair of red eyes glowed out of the darkness and suddenly it turned into a horror fest.

Naruto was pierced by shuriken and kunai and fell instantly; Sasuke was pinned to the wall by four kunai in each limb. A shadowy figure came from the darkness and pressed against Sasuke, who was still unable to see the person's face, despite their lips against his. He tasted blood and cried out, awakening with a yell. He sat up panting, blood dripped slowly from his lip; he had bitten it in terror. He wiped his forehead with the blanket. Sasuke grabbed the phone and was halfway through dialing Naruto's cell, but then stopped and dialed Sakura's.

"Hey there Sakura…Yeah I'm doing fine…Thanks…Actually, could you come over? Oh, awesome, thanks…Alright. I'll see you in a few minutes." He sighed and hung up, then got up and put on green striped pajamas, staring into the mirror. "I'm such a wreck…"

Sakura arrived six minutes later, and without knocking went in and walked up the stairs. She peeked around, pink hair swishing, and smiled as a pajamed boy came into her line of sight.

"Hey Sasuke, nice jammies." She grinned widely and stepped into the bedroom, where Sasuke was sitting.

"Thanks Sakura. Anyway…How're you doing?"

"Oh I'm good. My parents are still pissed at me… What's wrong kiddo?"

"Okay, first off, you're a month older than me, you have no right to call me kiddo."

"Well otherwise I'm going to call you Saucy-waucy."

"Kiddo's fine."

"I thought you'd see it my way." Sakura smiled and sat down on the bed next to him and lay down, staring at the ceiling.

"Yeah… I don't know what's wrong with me. I love Naruto so much, but I keep getting this weird feeling that is totally not a Naruto love feeling…It's like…Either a fullness or an emptiness, I just can't tell…And it's making me think too much…"

"About what?"

"How is our lifestyle going to affect our future? If we have kids are they going to have problems because they have two dads?"

"Ohh. Sasuke, this is totally normal. You're nervous and you're trying to poke holes in it." She rolled her eyes. "Your kids are going to be fine. Trust me. And you shouldn't care what other people think about you. They're jealous. I mean who wouldn't want a fine ass like you? Or Naruto for that matter, he's hot." Sakura smiled and patted his chest.

"Sakura, you are such an idiot sometimes. But thanks." Sasuke grimaced, thinking of the dream and then told Sakura about it in detail.

"That's horrible…But…I don't think it means anything."

"You think?"

"Yeah, but it's just a dream." She stopped for a second. "So wait, you're really thinking about having kids?"

"Maybe…" Sasuke sighed and rolled against her. "Do you think Naruto's girly enough to be a mother figure?"

"Probably…"

"Wanna be Aunty Sakura?"

"Maybe." She smiled and hugged him close. "I remember…When I first met you I would've done anything to get with you…" Sasuke watched her with a wary, but sad eye. "Before I knew you were gay…I'd have killed someone to be with you like this. But when I found out, no matter what I said to Ino, I wasn't surprised. There was this, untouchable aura around you, and I kinda knew you and Naruto were meant to be."

"Really?" Sasuke said, interested.

"Yeah…And I remembered thinking, I'm so jealous of Naruto…But maybe…I never really wanted to be with you, with you. But be with you like a friend. I don't have many friends, and I always wanted to fit in, and frankly, having a lover would be nice, but having a friend…That's so much better. You don't have to think relationship politics; you don't have to impress them all the time. You just can be yourself." Sakura kissed his cheek and stood up, frowning slightly.

Sasuke watched her stand, listening closely now.

"Maybe that's what's wrong with you. You're not nervous. Well, you are, but you aren't. You feel like you rushed into this and now you're afraid that in the future you won't be happy. Talk to Naruto some night instead of fucking, you know? Maybe it'll ease that heart ache in your chest, maybe it won't. But I know you and Naruto are going to be happy no matter what. And I wish you all the happiness in the world."

Sasuke stared at her in a dazed way; he had never heard her speak so passionately and was deeply impressed. He stood up and hugged her tightly, then let go and smiled.

"Thank you Sakura…I think that was exactly what I needed. And I love being your friend. And I want to be friends with you, and Naruto, forever…" Sakura smiled again at his words and patted his head.

"No problem kiddo…"

"Okay, maybe I do prefer Saucy-Waucy."

"That's the spirit. I've got to go Sasuke, I have to go visit another friend…" And without another word she turned and left. Sasuke stared at the floor and found drops of water on the ground. Sakura was crying.

**Later**

Naruto hopped up the stairs, shopping bags waving in each hand and dropped them at the door. He jumped through the room and tackled Sasuke.

"'Suke, I missed you baby." Naruto said kissing him softly on the lips.

"Hey Dobe…" Sasuke mumbled, hugging Naruto tightly.

"So 'Suke, do you want to be top or bottom?"

"Dobes…Do you think maybe…We could just talk tonight?" Sasuke whispered. Naruto paused and looked cautiously at Sasuke, then smiled.

"I'd love to Sasuke."

* * *

Kakashi: Okay. Well, no fun gay play, but I thought it was better to show a sensual side, I mean, I have, but not as well as this I thought personally. Anyway, sorry I didn't write for a while.

Sakura: No one noticed.

Kakashi: Weren't you getting arrested?

Sakura: I tricked them into thinking that bitch was me.

Kakashi: That's not nice Sakura.

Sakura: Whatever. See y'all later!

Kakashi: Indeed. See ya! Enjoy!!!!!


	21. Kissing Shikimaru

Kakashi: Okay, I may not have a chance to do this for awhile, so you get another chapter today.

Sakura: That's so nice of you.

Kakashi: Not really.

Sakura: Please don't fire me?

Kakashi: Anyway….Oh, uh, by the way, there's a teence of cross dressing, and it's a bit of awkwardness. Soooo, if you don't like that I'm sorry. And Shikimaru is in it a lot. Don't hate me. Please, it's a good thing?

* * *

"No way, Shikimaru is like a young Johnny Depp." Giggled the beautiful blonde Naruto.

"I'm going to stay with Orlando Bloom." Said the smiling black haired Sasuke. He ruffled Naruto's hair and smiled. "But you are so much better than any of them."

"Aww, thanks honey. Anyway…So wanna come with me to see Sakura, we're gonna trick some boys into paying for movie tickets. We might find some swinger pals for us." Naruto said winking.

Sasuke laughed loudly and rolled his eyes.

"No thanks babe, if they jump me I can't fight back. Doctor's orders."

"I doubt anyone's going to hurt you."

"I meant like, fuck wise."

Naruto grinned and hugged him tightly.

"I'm going to go do it though. I haven't seen Sakura in a while, okay?" Naruto said, smiling at Sasuke.

"Okay, if you do find any hot boys, bring them back for me." Sasuke slapped Naruto's ass, as Naruto walked out.

Naruto stretched as he walked out the door, staring around. He sighed and jogged down the road, his sandals flapping on the pavement. Naruto stopped halfway down the hill leading up to Sasuke's mansion and crouched, resting his head in his hands and sighing deeply. He stood up a few minutes later and skipped down, feeling cheerier. He had been having panic attacks lately, a few minutes of curling up and he was fine, but he didn't know that he was panicking about the very same things Sasuke had been.

Smiling, he snuck up on Sakura and popped out from above, but tripped up and collapsed onto the sidewalk in front of her.

"Howdy Sakura, this pavement is definitely solid. Thought it might be…Ya know…Trampoline-ish?"

"Tried to scare me and fucked up huh?"

"Yup. How's things?" Naruto grinned and stood up, dusting himself off and stretching.

"Things are good I guess. So is Sasuke okay with us hooking up with some boy toys?"

"Totally. He told me to bring one back." Naruto rubbed his eyes and sighed. "So when are they coming?"

"They're here silly boy." Sakura pointed behind her to Shikimaru and Rock Lee.

"I call Shiki, no way in hell am I with Rock Lee."

"Damn it Naruto. Be that way you big jerk." Sakura growled angrily and crossed her arms.

"Ladies are you coming or should we go home?" Shikimaru called in a bored tone.

"I'm not a lady!" Naruto called back, then looked down and flushed. "Erm, okay, yes I am."

Naruto was wearing a green kimono with pink flowers and dark green circles around the arms. His headband was around his neck and his long blonde hair hung around his face and to his shoulders, thanks to a special jutsu that could grow and shorten his hair, along with a jutsu that increased his chest by a few inches. His nails were painted pink and green. Naruto giggled.

"Naruto, how could you forget your cross dressed? You know if Sasuke wasn't so into that I might have a problem with you doing that." Sakura whispered, patting his back.

"My name is Naruko, hon. And it's funny to trick to them." He grinned and skipped over to Shikimaru. "Hey Shikimaru-kun, I'm Naruko. How are you?"

Shikimaru blushed and backed up a foot at the boldness of the blonde girl.

"I'm good now that you're here." Shikimaru said kissing "her" hand.

"Oh that's so sweet Shiki." Naruto grinned at Shikimaru. He poked Shikimaru and swished his hair. "It's so nice to find someone who knows how to treat a girl right." He winked at Sakura, who glared at him, as Rock Lee bored her with his constant compliments to her beauty.

"So are we going to the movie or what?" Sakura said, pushing Rock Lee away.

"Oh t-totally. I g-guess Naruko, you c-c-could uhm, sit with me at the theatre?" Stuttered Shikimaru, blushing.

"Of course cutie. I'd love too." Naruto smiled, grabbing Shikimaru's hand and skipping away, Sakura following closely behind.

Soon they had arrived and sat down in the theatre playing Sweeney Todd. Shikimaru sat down on Naruto's left side and they were quickly holding hands. Naruto was grinning widely, resting his head on Shikimaru's shoulder. Naruto was thinking how wonderful it would be to convert Shikimaru. (Forgive me, people who don't think Shiki is adorable, and want him to die for playing with Naruto, but I have ideas! Ideas I say!)

"I really like you Shiki…All soft and warm." Naruto whispered to the lightly sleeping Shikimaru.

"Really?" Shikimaru whispered back, turning to Naruto.

"Yeah, and maybe we could hang out at my house later after we have coffee." Naruto whispered seductively and rubbed his chest against Shikimaru, who blushed furiously and his eyes widened visibly.

"That'd be cool…I'd like that Naruko…" Shikimaru said quietly and stroked Naruto's hand softly.

**Later**

"Wasn't that an awesome movie? It was such a poetic ending; I just couldn't believe he killed his own wife. That's so horrible, but like, his lust for revenge caused him to do it, you know?" Naruto bubbled and clung to Shikimaru's arm.

"It seemed like a lot of work to do just to get at that one guy." Shikimaru yawned and looked over at Sakura. "What'd you think Sakura?"

"Johnny Depp was my favorite part. Well, that and the song at the beginning." She giggled and whispered to Naruto. "Rock Lee should move to London. He's _definitely _full of shit."

Naruto laughed effeminately and clung tighter to Shikimaru. Shikimaru grinned at Rock Lee, who was still staring at Sakura. Naruto let go and lead the way to the local coffee house. They got there five minutes later and Naruto ordered an ice tea and a chocolate chip cookie. Shikimaru eyed Naruto's ass as he bent over to look at the types of cookies. Sakura rolled her eyes and drop kicked Rock Lee as his hand reached for **her** ass.

"There's a molester over here." Sakura said to a police man standing outside and Rock Lee was carried out, still unconscious.

"That was so awesome Sakura, good job." Naruto smiled, and winked at her, nibbling his cookie.

"See, at least I restrain my perverted-ness to looking." Shikimaru said grinning and sitting down.

"And I'm proud of you for that." Naruto said, sitting on his lap. "But it's okay if I let you."

They finished their coffees and ice teas in silence, each thinking their own thoughts. Naruto got off Shikimaru and sat down in a chair, staring at the ground, his hair falling in a graceful arc.

"What's wrong Naruko?" Shikimaru said concerned.

"Nothing…Just tired…Maybe I should get home…" Naruto said in a weary voice.

"I'd love to walk you home!" Shikimaru said enthusiastically, surprising considering his waste no energy policy.

"Oh that'd be so nice of you Shiki."

"I'll see you tomorrow Naruko." Sakura said angrily and waved, putting on a falsely cheery smile. "I can't wait to hear the details." She whispered to Naruto.

"Come on Shiki, let's go." Naruto said, grabbing his hand and pulling him out of the shop. He stopped him halfway down the street and pulled him into an alley. "The thing is, I can't afford the place, so I have a room mate. Is that going to be a problem Shiki?"

"I can't think of a reason why we'd have a problem."

"That's good." Naruto smiled and tilted his head, pressing his lips against Shikimaru's and then pulling back. "This is going to be so much fun."

Shikimaru stood silently for a second and then blushed and smiled at the same time. Naruto grinned and pulled him along, through side streets and walked slowly up the hill. He had to crouch to hide his erection, but Shikimaru seemed to take no notice.

"Wow, you live in a really nice area Naruko."

"I know, it's great, but the cost is ridiculous." Naruto opened the door and called out. "Teme, we're home!" Naruto tightened his grip on Shikimaru's hand and smiled as Sasuke came down the stairs.

"Whoa, you live with Sasuke?" Shikimaru said shocked.

"Yep, it's so wonderful. He's an awesome roomie." Naruto said kissing Shikimaru on the cheek, and then kissed Sasuke on the lips.

"Hey now, why are you…Isn't Sasuke gay? And…He lives with Naruto…Naruko…Oh…my…god…" Shikimaru turned shocked to Naruto, who had undone his jutsu's, now plainly Naruto again.

"Howdy Shiki." Naruto said, kissing his shocked open mouth. "Wanna play?"

_**TO BE CONTINUED…

* * *

**_

Kakashi: I'm sorry if anyone was offended, or mad at me, please keep reading. I swear, if you guys don't like it, I'll cut it short, but please like it.

Sakura: I thought it was neat.

Kakashi: That's what I'm saying. Anyway, see you guys in chapter 22. Love and Peace!


End file.
